


Reduce Me To A Pleading Cry (Break The Skin and Tantalize)

by taggiecb



Series: Broody Sub Boss [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Awesome Niall, BDSM, Butt Plugs, CEO Harry, Dom Louis, M/M, Mystery character - Freeform, Oral Sex, Porn With Plot, Spanking, Sub Harry, Under-negotiated Kink, it's mostly plot actually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-25
Updated: 2017-01-25
Packaged: 2018-09-19 21:40:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 37,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9461441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taggiecb/pseuds/taggiecb
Summary: As the CEO of Styles & Styles, Harry Styles cuts a brooding and handsome figure at the helm of a very successful business. His reputation for intensity is well known, but you would be intense, too, if you had to work numbers all day, give countless orders, and conduct endless meetings. When all you really want to do at night--ache to do--is give away the reins, let someone else make the decisions, be ordered around for once, just--let go. Harry has reached his breaking point when one touch from a man whose very stance commands attention leads him back to a place he thought he’d never return.Or Harry is a broody submissive boss, Louis is a natural dom who works in the mail room at Styles & Styles, Niall is a matchmaking oracle, and a slender, dark haired man stands mute at the coffee stand encouraging others to spill their secrets.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I want to thank a number of people. Mostly my squadron who are the best. But specifically [Addy](http://www.tvshows-addict.tumblr.com) who whithout her brilliant idea this fic wouldn't even have been started, and also for betaing for me. And [Anitra](http://www.allwaswell16.tumblr.com) who also beta'd and holds my hand through every moment of my life. 
> 
> I know Addy will be disappointed that I didn't include her preferred tags, so I will add them here in her honour: 
> 
>  this is a bdsm fic, I’m not gonna tag everything, but there’s sex and a plot (shocking I know), this fic will educate you. I’d like to be remembered as the fic author that made you learn a thing or two between a good spanking and a buttplug. This shall be my legacy.
> 
>  I also want to semi dedicate this fic to Erin. Hope you like it!
> 
> ** I appreciate all the lovely comments, but I would rather not have this fic translated. Thanks for understanding.

“Fucking shit!” Harry curses as his pen fumbles out of his fingers for the third time in the last couple of hours. He doesn’t seem to have much control of his limbs or mouth as he struggles through the last few hours at the office for the day.

It’s not as though things are tough at work. He runs a well oiled machine. An absolute picture of efficiency in the fashion industry. Everyone wants a piece of Styles and Styles, which means they want a piece of Harry, and as he bends to pick up the pen in the center of the floor of his large, spacious office, he isn’t sure if he has much left to give.

As usual, his ever present and loyal assistant is immediately at the door. “Everything okay, boss?”

“Yes Liam, just dropped something.” Harry grits out, so out of character to his normal laid back demeanor.

Liam looks skeptical, as he probably should be. “Are you sure you don’t need help with anything?”

“Just a little peace and quiet, can you make that happen?”

“Sure thing, boss. But don’t forget that Gemma is due to call any minute with those numbers you need for tomorrow’s meeting.” Liam replies a little slower, a little quieter. Harry nods, and the room is silent once again. Gemma will call. She is nothing if not punctual, and she is as anxious to get their new children’s fashion line off the ground as he is. He’s tempted to just tell Liam to take the information himself, but he knows that Gemma would realise something is up. They have built this company from the ground up, they are partners, and best friends. She needs him to be on his toes, the ruthless business man, the guy in the office so that she can let her creative juices flow, and travel when they need to be at two places at once. No, he can’t just stop taking her calls.

He stands to stretch his legs and stare out of the massive picture window behind his desk. He used to love this window when he first moved into the newly built building. He had commissioned the design himself. He felt that it made everything look bigger, but on days like today, it just makes him feels small and very much alone.

As promised the phone rings a few short minutes later. “Hey Harry, I don’t have a lot of time, but I wanted to run these numbers by you really quick okay?” Gemma rambles on. It only takes a few hums, and a little play back of her words for her to be satisfied that he is listening, and she is off again to do God knows what, with God knows who. He sometimes wonders what it would be like if he traveled all over the world, and she was stuck in this office all day.

He scowls at himself because he is not ready to blame his sister because he is the business end of this company, and she is the creative director. And what is happening inside his head at the moment is certainly not her fault. He resigns himself to not getting anything more done for the day, and shrugs on his coat. He doesn’t look back to see if he has forgotten anything in the office, because there is barely anything there anyway. Just a desk, a phone, and a computer. And the window. He dismisses Liam as well, anyone that really needs him would have his cell anyway, and makes his way down the twelve floors to the outside world and another empty space that is his flat. No one talks to him on the way out, the security barely even acknowledge he is there.

Harry’s problem is that he does need help, he needs someone to take this feeling of being wound so tight that he is about to snap, and slowly unravel him until he is loose, and able to think straight once again. He needs to feel hands on his neck, and to feel like someone else is calling the shots, making him feel safe with just their touch, their voice. He needs so much, and he cannot keep going on feeling like this, brushing off his employees, leaving work early. Swearing over a dropped pen.  

He looks down as he sits in the back of his car, driver silently taking him home, not even asking if he had an alternate route planned. His knuckles are white with tension. He slowly opens his fists, and rubs them against his thighs, trying to iron out the taught muscles. He takes his phone from his pocket and starts to fiddle through it instead. He finds himself looking through old texts, singling one out in particular. It’s like he is trying to punish himself for being...different.

He hasn’t been able to tell anyone what he needs since he revealed to his now ex, Andrew, that there were things that made it...easier for Harry to function, more pleasurable for him than just sex.To his credit, Andrew didn’t run the other way, but he was very clear how he felt about being dominant over someone else whether that was in bed, or not, and it was a big fat no.

To say he was disappointed would be an understatement. It took him a long time to come to terms with what made him the most satisfied in bed, what made him crave for more. But it didn’t occur to him at the time that he would be denied that simply because he fell in love with someone that wasn’t willing to, or more ideally, wasn’t excited to share that with him. Harry loved him too much to give him up, but he wouldn’t make the same mistake again.

But now, not only is Harry not getting dominated, he is also not having any sex, and he is getting increasingly more on edge with every contract, every meeting, every business dinner. He isn’t sure what he is going to do.

When the car pulls to a stop in front of Harry’s building, he just stares at it, not sure if he actually wants to go inside, but really having no other choice. Where would he go that he would feel better? Who would he go to? He has no one to scratch this itch, so he might as well deal with it on his own, and by deal he means pretend it's not happening at all. He thanks his driver, and pushes the door open to the cold November chill, and walks into his house for an evening alone.

 

**

 

When Harry walks into the building the next morning, it’s with a new sense of determination. He needs to be CEO today, he needs to be Harry Styles of Styles & Styles. He can’t let a little thing like his sex life affect his work as much as he has let it over the past few weeks. He has an entire day full of meetings, and conference calls today, and absolutely needs to be on top of his game.

The elevator dings at the twelfth floor, and the large mirrored doors slide open to reveal Liam sitting at his large desk outside of Harry’s office, wringing his hand through his short cropped hair, and leaning into the phone on the desk. Harry looks over curiously, and when Liam finally hangs up, he looks towards Harry in a panic.

“The Beckhams have backed out.” He rushes the words out. Harry freezes. David and Victoria Beckham were supposed to be the faces, the names behind this new line. They were supposed to be in the building in moments.

“Why?” Harry can only think to say. Liam gulps and looks around, probably for an escape route if his expression says anything.

“They decided that they want to get out of the youth market, their kids are all older now. They want to steer their brand in another direction.” Liam looks guilty, and Harry knows that it’s not his fault, but in the moment, there is literally nothing else he can think of but to be angry at the person standing in front of him.

“What the hell Liam? It didn’t occur to you to pass over the phone to the man who is going to have to deal with the repercussions of this little decision? I was standing right here! I have an entire building of people who are depending on me to deliver their paychecks, and this is just not going to fly today!”

He knows that he is rambling, but he doesn’t care. He feels like a spout has been opened, and the end broken off. He doesn’t see the look of guilt on Liam’s face, and he doesn’t hear the elevator ding open shortly after he began his rant.

He doesn’t register the other person in the room until he feels a firm grip on his shoulder. It should have caused him to jump, but it doesn’t. He instead freezes and lets the person, the man, come around in front of him, meeting his gaze. Piercing blue eyes that are staring Harry down so hard that all of the moisture in his mouth evaporates, and he is left silent. The moment only lasts for just that, a moment, but to Harry it feels like it was hours.

“A little early in the day to be at one another’s throats yeah?” The man’s husky voice rasps into Harry’s ears and seemingly right through him. Suddenly the man is pushing something into his hand. Mail. He is the mail person. Harry just continues to stare, barely acknowledging that Liam is still in the background frantically punching numbers into the phone. All he sees is what is right in front of him.

The hand comes back. It’s strong grip is a surprise, given the delicate nature of the man’s fingers. Harry tries not to melt into it. “Why don’t we let the poor guy do his job? He looks a little high strung as it is.”

Before Harry’s brain can catch up with his mouth, he is practically whispering a low, “Yes, sir.” The man pauses for a second before a glint of mischief comes over him, almost whimsical, if it didn’t come with a good dose of sex and bad behaviour.

He pats Harry’s arm one last time, and as he passes, leans in and murmurs into his ear. “Good boy.” And then he is gone.

The elevator carries him away, and Harry is thrown back into the present. He suddenly registers  the noise of Liam’s voice practically shouting into the phone, another phone ringing in his office, chatter all around him as people start to come into the conference room for their first meeting of the day.

“Liam.” Harry tries not to shout, but he doesn’t seem to have control of his vocal cords. It comes out broken and desperate.

“Yes, sir?” Liam looks and sounds nervous, covering the phone receiver with his hand.

“Tell everyone I need ten minutes before we begin, please?” Liam looks confused. Harry hasn’t moved from the spot where he has been standing since he walked onto the floor.He has never postponed a meeting.

“As you wish, boss...” Liam says eagerly, trying, but failing his attempt to placate him. Harry marches to his office and all but slams the door shut.

 

**

 

Louis makes his way back down to the ground floor where the mail room is located. It is a busy spot with lots of people going in and out on a regular basis, but one constant is sitting at his desk, happily humming to some song that Louis doesn’t recognise, shuffling through paperwork as though he would never want to be anyplace else.

Louis sits on the worn, but comfortable chair across from his supervisor and waits until he is done doing what he is doing. Finally he is met with a large grin.

“Not so bad, was it?” Niall asks, glint of mischief ever present in his eyes.

“Not at all.” Louis replies. It’s the first time he has delivered the mail. He usually just comes in for the morning shift to sort and pile. But he had the time, and Niall was short staffed.

“Good, good. Everyone was friendly, got everything where it was suppose to be?” Niall asks, as he usually does about his precious mail system. Louis has never seen anyone take correspondence so seriously.

“Yeah, yeah everything was great.” Louis answers, although he can’t seem to get the incident from the top floor out of his mind. “What’s with the big boss? Mr. Styles?” Louis swallows the little extra moisture in his mouth he has from thinking about those bright green eyes. The way they stayed on him. The way they followed him. But it was the way the man spoke that Louis is still mesmerized by. That deep voice, so high strung and harsh, that almost melted like chocolate for Louis. The man called him sir. And fuck, that was hot. And just from a touch at that. He wouldn’t mind finding out what he could do with that.

“Nope.” Niall says, not even looking up from his desk work.

“What?” Louis asks. He didn’t even say anything. This time Niall does look up, fixing him with wide, serious eyes.

“NOPE.” He repeats, as though Louis didn’t hear him the first time. Louis sighs because he knows better than to question anything Niall says.

Louis stands, stretching a little before he leaves Niall to it. “Fine, but for the record, I wasn’t asking.”

“Sure you weren’t, Tommo. Why don’t you go for lunch? There’s not a whole lot to do after the morning rush, but I could use you back anyway, if you need to clock some hours. Try the coffee stand at the end of the street. They have a maple scone to die for.” Louis nods before he leaves.

When Louis first met Niall, his first impression was that he was young, vibrant, a little quirky, and very loud. But over the months that Louis has worked for the man, he has learned a lot. And not just about mail delivery.

Niall’s name in the building is Oracle. That is what everyone calls him. Louis thought it was incredibly strange at first, but he soon learned why. People from all over the building, from Janitors to VP’s will come into the mail room to talk to Niall. They will ask his advice from anything from career moves to inner office disputes. But the biggest specialty for _Niall The Oracle Horan_ is love. In the six months he’s been working with Niall, Louis has seen him match up five different couples. One of them is married now. Louis has never seen anything like it. It’s almost like mail delivery is a hobby while the love boat is having a slow day.

Not that his actual job suffers. Some of the older people on the first floor have told Louis that the place has never been more efficient. The CEO himself has offered Niall a promotion to the top floor, but Niall will not take it. He wants to be _where the action is_ he says. Where the people are. Louis has never met a person who has found their calling in the mailroom of a multi million dollar corporation, but he has also never met someone that is anything like Niall either.

So when Niall tells him to go to the little stand at the end of the street and order a maple scone, he doesn’t ask questions.

He walks to the small stand and breathes in the scent of autumn. Pumpkin spice,  cinnamon and chocolate surround him as he gets in line to make his order and notices how busy the place is.  The stand looks like an old wooden train carriage, or an intricate gazebo, all soft edges, and dark wood. When Louis finally gets to the front of the line, he is greeted by a slender, dark haired man with almost black eyes, and a hint of a smile on his lips. He doesn’t say anything, just waits patiently for Louis to make his order. As he looks at the counter to the baked good on display, he sees a small sign near the cash register. ‘ _Lay It On Me’,_  it says. Louis looks at it for a second, then back at the man. He is still standing silent, slight smile on his lips. Louis looks at the man's name tag, as he usually does before he orders from a food place. They have them on for a reason, right?

 _Sonic._ Louis looks at the man’s face, and then down at the tag again. “Am I really supposed to believe your name is Sonic?” The man simply shrugs, not replying. “As in the hedgehog?” Louis edges on, trying to get a rise out of the man who seems much too calm for someone working as a barista. But he gets nothing but an eyeroll. “Are you not able to talk?” Louis asks cautiously. He doesn’t want to mock someone’s disability. But this guy is just a bit of an enigma. The man nods, and points to the small sign that Louis had spotted earlier. “Ah, you are a listener. I see. Just the man behind the bar. Trying to solve the world’s problems one listening ear at a time.” Sonic shrugs again, turning to get a cup. He holds it in his hand with a marker in the other, apparently done with Louis’ inquisition. Louis isn’t falling for that. If this guy wants to hear about him, he is going to have to earn it. “Just a scone please. My boss told me they are to die for.” At Sonic’s eyes go soft, Louis is starting to wonder if the guy has all of his marbles in the right basket, but he receives his scone and pays without incident. Louis shakes his head, wondering what kind of twilight zone he has walked into.

 

**

 

Harry hasn’t had time all morning to think about what had happened with the man who delivered the mail. He was too busy making deals and signing papers. Of course the Beckhams pulling out didn’t matter. They had plenty of celebrities more than willing to be the face of their clothing line. They had someone else set up within the hour. He apologised profusely to Liam and sent him an edible arrangement. But by two in the afternoon, Harry was still strung out, and Liam practically begged him to take five minutes and go for a walk. Harry reluctantly agreed when he just about cried over them being out of his favourite hazelnut creamer. Harry knew exactly where he wanted to go.

The coffee stand is practically free of people, which is just how Harry likes it. He walks up to the counter and is greeted by a familiar smile. “Hey man, how are ya?” He doesn’t get a reply, doesn’t really expect one. “The usual please.” He leans against the counter, drawing little circles with his finger on the clean surface. “This day has sucked so bad S, so bad. I just….I met a guy.” He rolls his eyes at his own presumptions. “Well no, I can’t even say that. He works in my building, _for me_ . I assume anyway. I’ve never seen him before, but he delivered my mail.” Sonic passes him his coffee and croissant. Harry wraps his hand around the warm cup, letting himself absorb the heat. “He touched me, S! Fuck, the way his hand felt-- and he told me to calm down, or relax.” Harry gets caught up in his own head, the memory from just this morning, a few hours earlier a little cloudy. “I can’t even remember because all I could do was look and feel. Fuck, I called him Sir!” Sonic’s eyebrow raises at this, and Harry nods. “I know. I was at work, and just his touch made me want to submit to him. Do you know how long it has been since I have submitted to someone?” A slight twitch of the other man’s mouth gave him the answer. “Of course you do. Fuck, no. I shouldn't even be thinking about this. He’s just a guy who happened to look at me the right way, or the wrong way. I don’t even know my left from my right anymore.” Harry sighs heavily, not ready to give up his time with the man who listens to him. He takes a sip of the cooling coffee, and looks around to make sure he isn’t taking up anyone else’s time. “You know what happened last time with Andrew.” He gets a nod. “I can’t do that again. I can’t even think about it. But, I also can’t just ask this guy if he’s into domming me for kicks either now, can I?” Sonic stares at him intently. “Can I?” Sonic doesn’t look convinced. “I didn’t think so. I can tell you one thing, if I don’t do something soon, I am going to end up dead or in jail.” The barista practically rolls his eyes, and Harry does too. “No, I am not being dramatic. You have seen me dramatic, and this isn’t it.” He stretches back to his full height, and drops a heavy tip on the counter. “Anyway, thanks for the coffee, and thanks for the listen. I will see you.” He recieves a warm smile, returns to his small tasks. Harry trudges back towards work.

 

**

 

“Louis!” Niall calls out from his office. Louis saunters over, glad to be free from his menial task of stacking outgoing mail for the morning. When he walks into the room, Niall is sitting at this desk with his hand over the phone receiver. The look on his face is stranger than usual.

“What’s up?” Louis asks, a little cautious.

“Harry Styles wants to see you in his office immediately.” Niall practically squeaks. Louis’s eyes could possibly be bugging out of his head. “What in the hell did you do this morning?” Niall hisses. Nothing, Louis wants to answer automatically. But it wasn’t nothing. In fact, it was definitely something.

Instead, he just points to the door. “So, should I…?” He’s getting a tiny rush from pulling one over on The Oracle, but at the same time, uncharted waters could be a little terrifying.

“Yes, go!” Niall half shouts, hand running rough over his face. Lois doesn’t ask again.

 

**

 

Louis walks into the lobby to immediately spot the man from this morning sitting at his desk. He is smiling and typing furiously on his keyboard. When Louis walks tentatively up to the desk the man looks up, smile light over his features.

“Hello, can I help you?”

“I am here to see Mr. Styles.” Louis informs him.The man smiles even wider.

“Louis, is it?” Louis nods. “I’m Liam, Niall told me your name. Harry’s in his office, go on in.” Liam goes back to typing without giving Louis another glance. Louis takes a deep breath and steps towards the large door and opens it.

He opens the door to an almost empty room, and it startles Louis for a moment before he sees Harry sitting behind his oversized desk, which is also almost completely devoid of any objects. He closes the door behind him and walks purposefully over to the desk. Harry stands awkwardly, and reaches his hand out for Louis to shake. Harry freezes when they touch. It is weird for a second before he takes his hand back and gestures for Louis to sit. Louis complies and waits for Harry to get his thoughts together since he seems to be struggling.

“I would just like to apologise for this morning.” Harry starts off. His voice is strained, and he isn’t quite looking Louis in the eye, but Louis’ shoulders relax a bit anyway.

“Is that it? Well, it’s fine Mr. Styles.”

“No!” Harry cuts him off, almost uncomfortable with Louis’ words. Louis sits back, and lets him talk.  “Please, call me Harry. Everyone else does.”

“Okay, Harry. It is fine really. I had no business.”

“Well, you did say something and-- you were right. So thank you.” Louis waits for something else, but nothing else comes. The air is getting more tense as the seconds tick by. Louis makes to stand before Harry blurts out.

“How do you like working here?” Louis has a feeling that Harry doesn’t actually care about his job enjoyment, but he relaxes again and smiles this time.

“It has been nothing but enjoyable. Thank you for asking.” Harry nods encouragingly.

“So, how long have you worked for me...for us I mean...here?” Louis has to work really hard to fight off a smirk, it isn’t easy.

“About six months.” Harry’s eyebrows shoot up at that.

“Really? I have never seen you before.” Harry leans into the comment, thoughtful, his bottom lip squeezed between two of his fingers.

“I am not really here this time of the day. I have another job, but Niall needed me, so here I am.”

“Another job?” Harry looks concerned, but Louis just smiles.

“It’s an internship. I needed it for a college course. But it doesn’t pay, so this is actually the ideal situation for me. Aside from today.” Harry looks horrified at this comment, and

Louis can’t help it, he laughs. Head tipped back to let out a mouth opened laugh. “Not you Harry, just schedule wise”.

 

“Interesting.” Harry murmurs, almost to himself and wrinkles his eyebrows. Whatever he’s thinking, he’s not sharing..

Louis decides to be bold then, because he is here, and Harry is on the brink of flustered, and he can’t help but want to see the flushed face he had seen first thing this morning. “May I ask you a question Harry?”

“Yes, of course.” Harry replies, eyes wide and serious.

“Are you always in the habit of calling your mail staff up into your office for a chat?” And there it is, the flush, the sudden rise of his chest. The downcast eyes. Louis can’t place a finger on what that look is, but he is quickly becoming very fond of it.

“N...No, I am not. I just wanted to… because of this morning. Thank you for coming. I mean, I didn’t make you uncomfortable, did I?” Harry stands.Louis assumes this is the end of their little tête-à-tête. So he stands as well.

“Not at all Harry. I am quite comfortable.I hope you are as well.” He flashes a bright smile in Harry’s direction, and forgoes the handshake for a little pat on his shoulder. Harry stands motionless, but smiling tentatively while Louis marches happily out of the room.

Louis makes his way back down to the mail room straight into Niall’s office. He is typing on his computer like it did him wrong. Seems to be a theme in this building. “I’m back boss.” Louis can’t keep the smug smile off of his face. Niall just humps at him. “Want to know-”

“Nope.” Niall almost yells at him.

“Whatever you say man. Time for me to head out anyway. See you in the morning.” Niall simply glares at him. Louis would laugh, but he’s frankly a little nervous.

 

**

At the very least, meeting Louis has distracted Harry from some of the stressful days in the last month. Unfortunately after their first encounter, he has not laid eyes on the man again. Louis had told him he wasn’t normally in the building at that time of day, but two weeks later, Harry has started to wrack his brain for reasons to have him around. Just to have Louis’ calm voice laying a balm on his nerves.

It’s not that he has spent this entire time pining over the guy, far from it. Harry has a busy schedule that keeps his mind more than occupied. Regardless, sometimes he would hear a voice, or see a tousled head of hair and his mind would automatically think _Louis_ . Like now, standing in line at the coffee stand he can distinctively hear someone ribbing Sonic. It sounds in good fun. He can’t see Sonic’s face to know for sure though.

“Blink once for yes, Sonic.” Followed by a loud laugh and a few low mumbles. He tunes out, deciding to scroll through the emails on his phone waiting for his turn at the counter. Until suddenly he hears “Damn, I’ll get you next time Sonic.” The voice is close, and he only looks up in time for the man who owns it to be literally running into him.

Harry stumbles back, soon steadied by a firm grip on his arm. The voice may have been familiar, but he’d recognise that hand anywhere. Louis.

“Steady there.” Louis says, and Harry immediately takes a step towards him, he can feel Louis’ voice settle him, center him more than anything else would.

“Thanks.” Harry replies. Although he isn’t sure why. Louis ran into him after all. Scratch that, Harry knows exactly why. They end up just standing and staring. Far too close to one another to be casual, but not close enough for Harry’s liking regardless.

“So, I hope you didn’t come here for the stimulating conversation.” Louis says lightly taking a sip of his drink. There is a smile playing on his lips, and Harry wonders if this is his face all the time, or if he just likes smiling to Harry. Harry hopes it’s the latter.

“I was just getting my dose of caffeine.” Harry attempts, light and casual. It falls short.

“I don’t think caffeine is really what the doctor would prescribe in your case.” Louis arches a brow, still smirking. Harry arches one right back at him. “I mean,” Louis continues. “you’re pretty tense as it is, am I right?” Louis reaches up and gently taps the muscles between Harry’s shoulder and neck with the tips of his fingers. “Yup. Hard as a rock.”

“I--I just like Sonic’s macchiato.” Harry replies, more brave than he has ever been in Louis’ presence. “He makes it like they do in Italy.”

Louis looks at him thoughtfully. It’s not a once over, but Harry can’t help the urge to squirm under his gaze. “Try the decaf.” He says, looking Harry square in the eye.

Harry gulps, tongue licking his lips on their own accord. “I--I’m your boss. You know that, right?” The slight smirk comes back, more playful than teasing this time.

“Are you going to report me to HR Harry?” He leans in a little, closer to Harry's ear. “Demand they build a case against me for inappropriate decaf suggestion?” His eyes are almost closed shut, he is smiling so wide. Harry can’t help but smile back.

“It wasn’t a suggestion.” Harry states, and Louis just shakes his head, leaning back out of Harry’s space once again.

“No, it wasn’t.” And then he turns to walk away from the moving line. Harry is almost to the counter, but his eyes are still on Louis’ retreating figure. He wonders if Sonic could even help him today.

“Decaf caramel macchiato, Sonic.” Harry says, resigned. Sonic just does as he’s asked, a knowing smile on his lips.

 

**

 

Louis walks into Niall’s office in the early afternoon. He fully expects Niall to be surprised to see him, but at the same time he is not at all surprised when Niall barely lifts his head before he says, “Told you it was a good coffee spot, didn’t I?”

“How did you know I was just at the coffee stand?” Louis looks at him suspiciously. Niall just laughs, but points to the cooling cup of coffee in his hand. “Oh yeah, Um, yeah. It’s alright. I enjoy the barista more than the coffee.” This gets Niall’s attention, and Louis receives an interesting look that is a mix between fond and suspicious.

“Come again?” Niall replies.

“He doesn’t talk, ever. But he is funny, I guess. I can’t explain it. We have fun. He’s great. I pretend that I am trying to trick him into talking. He laughs at my jokes. I have been kind of hanging out there on my lunch breaks until it gets too busy.”

Niall shakes his head and smiles a knowing smile.“Alright then.”

“So, guess who else was there--” Louis starts, but is interrupted by the door opening, and Max from accounting walking in, and throwing himself into the only other empty chair in the room. He buries his head into his arms that are crossed over the desk. Louis thinks the guy has lost his mind, but Niall just pats his arm.

“What can I do for you today, Max?” Niall has yet to stop his work through either his or Max’s interruptions, and Louis can’t help but be amused by it.

“Chris is a wanker.” Max replies, his diluted British accent showing through.

“I am sure he isn’t Max, but you two aren’t right for each other. I told you that before.” Max makes a strangled noise and lifts his head.

“I know you have this 100% success rate or whatever.I also know you are trying to set me up with Jack from the fifth floor, but he is just so not my type, Niall. Please.”

Niall just shakes his head. “While I will neither confirm nor deny that I am trying to set you up with anyone, I will remind you that in the last twelve months you have come into this office and cried over three separate men who have done you wrong in one way or another. And may I remind you that I had warned you that this would happen before every one of these guys got serious?”

“But Jack? Jack is so boring. I want a guy who is a little bit dangerous. A little edgy. Someone who can really show me what’s what. You know what I mean?” Max looks to Louis, like it’s the first time he noticed him sitting there and gives him a conspiratorial wink. Louis just leans back, wanting nothing to do with this voodoo that Niall has going on here but making zero attempt to leave either. It is simply too entertaining.

Max looks back towards Niall, a pleading look on his face. Why can’t you find someone for me like that?” A light goes on in Max’s eyes. “Someone like Mr. Styles.”

“Now, wait a minute.” Louis bursts out without thinking. Two sets of eyes are on him instantly. He immediately starts to backtrack. “Why can’t you just go out and meet a guy at a bar like the rest of us.” He continues weakly. Max rolls his eyes.

“Have you not been listening? It’s not been working. I need Niall’s magic.” Max looks at Niall hopefully, and Louis looks at Niall mutinously. Niall just shrugs.

“You have to trust the process boys, now let me get back to this work, run along.” Max pouts, but stands and gives them both a small wave. Louis crosses his arms.

“My success rate is  actually 98%. It would have been 100% if Dave didn’t die on me in the middle of the ride of his life.”

“I didn’t come in here to be set up with anyone.” Louis answers feebly. Niall snorts.

“Oh really, why exactly did you decide to spend your afternoon off from work in your supervisor’s office when I just saw you about six hours ago?” Louis closes his mouth again. “Who did you see in line at Sonic’s stand?” Louis sighs, but gets up, and leaves the office as well.

“Exactly. See you in the morning!” Niall calls out brightly.

 

**

 

Louis walks into the mail room on a bright morning, again filling in at an odd shift. He walks straight to Niall’s office, greeting people he passes with a smile on the way. Everyone is so friendly, he feels a little bad that he doesn’t actually know any of their names. When he finds Niall, he is on the phone, a bright smile on his face, speaking low, which is really not Niall’s style. He hangs back, waiting for Niall to be finished with his business (although it looks a lot more on the pleasure side) before he greets him.

“What the hell is this?” Niall deadpans as soon as he’s of the phone.

“What?” Louis asks, a little scared, a lot confused.

“What are you wearing? You are just delivering mail.” His voice is a little strangled, and Louis has never really seen Niall so off balance before. Louis looks down, and suddenly remembers that he is not in fact dressed for mail room delivery, but instead is clad in his music production intern Louis outfit. He has a full suit on, as is requested by his employer. Dark blue, with an almost blood red burgundy tie, a white button down shirt, and brown leather shoes. His hair is also styled into a backswept quiff that Niall has probably never seen before.

“I have to wear a suit for my internship. I told you this.” Louis cocks a hip, and Niall just closes his eyes as though he’s praying.

“You didn’t tell me that you could pull a look like that!”

“I have to go in after I am done here, and I will not have time to change. I am sorry, it’s just a suit. I am sure I’ll be fine.” Louis quirks a lip, laughing silently at the absurdity of the entire conversation.

“Oh you’ll be fine.” Niall rolls his eyes, and flings his hands in the air. “You know what? You win. Go, deliver your mail. Behave yourself.” Louis has no idea what the man is talking about, but he goes anyway, and grabs the cart for the top three floors while he has the chance.

 

**

 

Harry is running late, and while he is silently scolding himself for not being more efficient this morning, he is also glad that he doesn’t actually have any typical crisis happening at the moment, so he can afford a late morning for once.

He rushes through the large glass doors of the foyer, and calls out to the closing elevator door. A hand reaches out, and he slips in as the doors close once again. He only intends to give the person a small nod in thanks, usually avoiding elevator conversation, but when he glances over, he sees a familiar face smiling back at him. The well styled, fully suited, smiling face of Louis Tomlinson.

Harry feels like he has forgotten how to breathe as he takes in the scene in front of him. Louis is standing straight, but still exudes an air of casual confidence, one hand on his hip, while the other is resting gently on a cart stacked with correspondence. He’s smirking, as he usually does in Harry’s presence. Everything about him screams confidence. And Harry starts to feel that familiar pull.

“Good morning.” Louis finally speaks. To hear Louis’ light, optimistic voice feels like being rewarded for good behaviour. Harry could whimper on the spot.

“Good morning to you, Louis.” The name gets caught in his throat and comes out gruff and desperate. He can’t stop staring at Louis’ clothes, his perfectly tailored, eatable slim figure. Louis notices, of course he notices.

“I know, not the most practical outfit for delivering mail, but it’s sort of my other work uniform.”

Right, Louis’ internship. Harry had forgotten. Louis looks down to the brown leather shoes, and Harry practically drools over them. It’s nothing that he personally would wear, but they just look so good on Louis that he wants to worship them.

“You wear this suit everyday?” Harry blurts out instead, and it catches Louis off guard, but he chuckles anyway.

“Yeah, most days….do you like it?” Louis asks, and Harry knows Louis knows the answer to that. Anyone with eyes could see that Louis has an affect on him. Harry nods anyway. 

“I’d rather hear you say it.” Louis smiles, and  while his mouth opens to immediately obey. But just as the words start to spill out, the door opens, and their little spell is broken. A small group of people looking smart, and fresh walk into the elevator smiling.

“Good morning Mr. Styles.” A younger lady greets him. He flicks an annoyed glare before glancing back at Louis who has a mischievous smile on his lips. “Good morning sir.” the woman greets Louis as well, and Harry is confused for a moment before he realises that this lady most likely thinks that Louis is a higher up in the building. Harry feels commiserative and protective all at once. He doesn’t understand how anyone could not bow to the will of the man, but at the same time, something deep down inside him wants to be the only one able to do so.

The elevator dings a few floors up, and the group is gone again, giving nods to both Louis and Harry. When they are alone again Louis turns his gaze back to Harry. “ _‘Everyone calls me Harry_ ’, huh?” Louis teases and Harry can feel himself flush. He looks down, not knowing what to do with all of this attention.

“Okay, not everyone.” He mumbles.

“Or maybe everyone but me.” Louis says. It’s not a question, and Harry nods. “Yeah?” Harry looks up, and Louis is...affected too. Harry can tell by his dilated pupils. His eyes, always so piercing, are now almost pleading for Harry to give him the right answer.

Harry takes a breath. “Only you.”

Unfortunately the elevator doors open once again and Harry works incredibly hard not to roll his eyes at the intrusion. Partly for being interrupted once again and partly for who actually steps into the elevator. Ben from marketing gives them both a wide, leering smile and pushes his floor that Harry is thankful to see isn’t the top.

“Good morning Mr. Styles.” Ben addresses Harry, who does his best to not grimace and continues to stare forward. Harry hopes they can just be awkward and silent for a few minutes, but that is definitely not in Ben. “And hello to you. I don’t think we have met yet. Ben Winston, marketing. You must be the new VP everyone is talking about.” Ben moves in close to Louis’ space, and Harry is about to correct him, and maybe remind him once again about inappropriate workplace behaviour when he sees Louis smile at Ben. Not the same smile that Harry usually gets, but a smile nonetheless.

“Must be.” He chuckles out, shaking Ben’s hand right back.

“Well, I am really looking forward to working with you.” Ben practically purrs in Louis’ direction. “I can be very helpful if you need someone. A right hand man of sorts. My talents are… wide spread.”  Ben is staring right at Louis’ crotch, and Harry is practically fuming at this point. He tells himself that it’s because he doesn’t tolerate this kind of behaviour in his building, and he doesn’t, but he knows deep down it’s because he doesn’t tolerate anyone looking at Louis this way.

He clears his throat, getting the attention of the two other men in the space. “I am sure Louis-- Mr. Tomlinson has plenty of help where he needs it Winston. No need to spread yourself too thin with your own position.” His voice is stiff and rough, and Ben thankfully takes a hint, since he turns to look forward again, but not before giving Louis a not so discreet wink that Louis has to cover his mouth from not laughing about.

Soon enough, Ben is gone, and Louis practically doubles over laughing. Harry huffs and stares straight ahead. “Pretty pleased with yourself, aren’t you?”

“I am pleased, yes.” Harry doesn’t acknowledge him. “You, on the other hand, aren’t.” Louis states. Again, not asking, but telling. Harry really wishes he would stop doing that. Or do it more. He can’t tell, but it’s not helping him think clearly at the moment.

“Impersonating a boss.” Harry shakes his head, and he can hear the snicker behind him.

“I get that a lot actually, I just go with it now. I am not sure what it is about me that makes people think I am in a position of power, but I rarely can convince them otherwise.” Louis replies casually, and Harry can barely help the pointed look he gives.

“Yeah, it’s such a mystery.”

Louis just shrugs.

“But that wasn’t the problem.” Louis crosses his arms. “You were jealous.” Harry can’t tell if he is upset or curious. “Of a man paying attention to me.” And there is the look he had earlier. The want. The need for Harry to want him, and that is just something that Harry didn’t even know that he longed for, but right now it’s the most important thing, the only thing that he wants to think about.

Harry doesn’t answer, and the elevator suddenly stops, but Louis reaches out, and pushes the button to close the doors again. “Answer me, Harry.” He demands, and it’s too much. The tone of his voice, the position of his stance, looming over Harry even though he is smaller. His presence filling Harry’s space and all of his senses. All of a sudden, Louis is everywhere.

Harry licks his lips, and looks Louis straight in the eye. Louis’ eyes soften while he waits for an answer. “Yes.” Harry says simply. Louis lets go of the button holding them in the space together, and the fog subsides. The real world awaiting to greet them. Louis pushes his cart out the door while Harry stands silent, trying to catch his breath.

“Have a good morning Harry.” Louis says before the doors close again to take Harry to the top. He doesn’t have time to reply, but the smile on Louis’ face makes him think that he doesn’t have to.

 

**

 

Louis walks back into the mailroom a few hours later with a cart full of outgoing mail, and a smile plastered on his face. He pops into Niall’s office just like he always does before leaving.

“All done Niall!” He calls in. Niall looks up from his computer, and smiles right back at him.

“What’s got you all chipper this morning?” Niall asks, laughing mischievously. Louis hesitates for a moment, but he decides to brave on. Niall will find out anyway, Louis is sure of it. “I was talking to Harry.” He’s almost shy about it, like he’s telling his mom he met a boy. Niall responds by running his hands through his mess of blonde hair. He sighs loudly before shrugging.

“It would have been quicker if you told me you could wear a suit sooner.” Niall says like it’s the most obvious answer to Louis’ statement.

“Niall, you are weird. Everyone can wear a suit. You put one leg after the other in the pants…”

“It’s not the suit! It’s the way you stand in the suit!” Niall waves both hand frantically at him, and Louis can’t help but smile.

“Yeah, I don’t get it either. I don’t know what I do in the suit to make people be weird to me.” He just shrugs, and Niall rolls his eyes so hard that Louis can’t see his blue eyes anymore.

“Legs parted, hands joined in front of you, like you own the place. Like you are in charge!” Louis immediately corrects his stance because, although he isn’t sure why, he feels like he’s being scolded.

“I don’t do it on purpose.” Louis mumbles, adjusting his lapels on his jacket.

“I know!“ Niall throws his hands in the air dramatically. “Which is why this changes everything.”

“What does it change?” Louis asks, fully confused at this point. Niall just smiles sympathetically at him, like Louis is the only one not in on the story.

“Just be careful with him, okay? He’s special.” Niall says.

“Harry?” Louis answers hopefully, thinking that he’s getting permission from The Oracle himself to go through with whatever it is that he and Harry have going on.

“Of course Harry! Now get out of here or you’ll be late for your other job!” Niall shoos him out the door with a laugh, and Louis goes before Niall changes his mind.

 

**

 

Harry waits until it’s almost five o'clock before he wanders down to the mail room. He knows that Louis isn’t going to be there, but that doesn’t stop his heart from skipping a beat when he opens the doors to the quiet open space. After a cursory scan of the room, and a few greetings he makes his way into Niall’s office.

Niall is not at all surprised to see him, and that doesn’t actually surprise Harry, although he knows that it should. “What can I do for you, boss?” Niall greets him cheerfully. And, okay. Right to it then.

“You have a Louis Tomlinson on your staff?” Harry asks, although they both know that he does. It’s just courtesy. Niall nods, and his smile turns bigger, more knowing. Of course he knows. Niall knows everything. “Well, he has done a few rounds upstairs, and I just want to recommend he get a more...permanent place on the administrative staff.” He clears his throat, trying to look authoritative.

 

Niall just looks at him sympathetically, and he is tempted to remind him of who is actually in charge here. “I am afraid that’s not going to happen Mr. S. Louis has other commitments. He’s going to college and interning with a big music producer at the moment.”

“We offer an excellent internship, and we pay.” Harry folds his arms petulantly. Niall laughs.

“Yes, but do you produce music?” Niall replies softer, and gets into Harry’s space like he’s talking to a friend, not his boss. “Listen, Louis is great. But if you want to see more of him--” Harry is about to protest, but Niall’s hand up immediately shuts Harry up. He knows better with Niall. “--If you want to see him, you’re going to have to find him. And when he’s in this building, it’s usually before 7 am. If I could change that, I would. He is a good worker. And a good person to have around.”

Harry straightens again, trying to compose himself. Niall just pats his back, and goes back to his desk, shutting down his computer. “You know, you’re not so bad yourself.” He smirks, walking out of the office with Niall.

“Well, sorry to disappoint, but I am taken.” Niall says proudly.

“Really?” This is something Harry didn’t know. “You’ve never brought them around to the family events.”

“Nah, he’s a bit shy, doesn’t talk a lot. I think you would like him though. Zayn is his name.”

“You sure are a mysterious one Niall. I hope you change your mind and come up to my floor one of these days.” Harry shakes his head as they reach the main doors, going their separate ways to vehicles.

“I am right where I want to be boss, see you.” Niall smiles, and Harry is sure he has his entire life figured out. Must be nice.

 

**

 

Harry walks into the door of the building like he normally does, but today is altogether different.  It is still pitch dark outside, the soft glow of the security lights are the only things lighting the main lobby. He is normally one of the first people in the place every day, but this is like a whole new dimension that he hasn't yet explored in his own company.

Instead of his normal route to the top floor, Harry takes a deep breath and goes straight through the main lobby. The open space soon turns to narrow corridors and closed doors, everything is locked and dark until suddenly there is no quiet. It starts as a low bass and as Harry approaches his destination it turns into actual music. Something familiar, that Harry has definitely heard before.

 _So, Annie, are you OK?_  
Are you OK Annie?  
You've been hit by  
You've been hit by  
A smooth criminal

He slowly opens the door, and his ears and eyes are overwhelmed, the music blasting loud, and the light a bright glow compared to the rest of the building.

In  front of him, on the far end of the large space is a lone figure. Louis is wearing a rough pair of gray sweats and a black tank shirt that hangs low below his arse. It still hugs the curves of his hips and shifts seductively with every movement Louis makes. And he is moving. His entire lower half is swinging wildly to Michael Jackson and using the smartly stacked pile of white envelopes in front of him as drums.

 

_Bum bum ba da dum dum ba da bum bum._

Harry watches him, mesmerised by Louis’ swift movements, seamlessly flitting from table to table, barely looking at what he is doing and yet still with a confident set if his wrists, that flick deftly through the seemingly endless piles.

Suddenly Louis opens his mouth.

  
_So they came into the outway_  
It was Sunday, what a black day  
Mouth to mouth resuscitation  
Sounding heartbeats intimidations

 

Louis belts out. His voice his crackly, and rough compared to MJ’s voice, it sounds raw, and dangerous. Louis finishes the stack of paper in his hand, and suddenly brings his hand up to start air drumming, showing off his sinewy biceps, and the patch of dark hair under his arms. Harry wants to reach out and touch, he wants to see what those arms can do to him. Suddenly he remembers where he is, and that he is not supposed to be here. He immediately backs up, intending to sneak back out where he came from. Maybe even knock on the door as though he just showed up if he feels brave enough.

Unfortunately in his haste, he doesn't look where he is going. Who would think that a pile of paper could cause that much noise?  

“What the fuck?” Louis actually jumps. Harry freezes instantly. Louis finally turns around and Harry sees him full faced for the first time since he walked in. “Do you know how long it took me to- oh.” Louis’ eyes land on Harry's. “Sorry.”

“I'm so sorry.” Harry is flushed head to toe under Louis’ hard gaze. Louis just stares, both stuck in their spots, stuck in their own heads until Louis finally swallows and folds his arms over his chest.

“If you were truly sorry, you would clean up your mess.” His voice is a little shaky, but Harry doesn't care. He doesn't care about anything. He drops to his knees like a puppet that had its strings cut and the floor feels cold and hard through his dress pants. His head dips so low that he can feel the strain of muscles pulling at the back of his neck.

He can hear Louis’ breath hitch as he starts picking up the letters around him, not knowing what order they’re supposed to be in, just desperate to have something to do with his hands. He is painfully aware of Louis’ unmoving figure standing over him. When he gets all of the dropped mail put in a haphazard pile he puts his hands back in his lap, and keeps looking at the floor.

Finally Louis walks towards him. Harry doesn't dare to move, or look up, or even think about what is happening. He just waits for Louis. Suddenly there is a hand in his hair, kneading, threading  fingers. Harry tries not to lean into it. But he does anyway, just a little. Louis breathes out a low “Harry” before he encourages him to get on his feet. Harry doesn't want to get up. He wants to be on his knees for Louis. Thankfully Louis seems to understand and slides down onto his knees in front of him.

“Harry.” Louis tries again. And Harry slides his eyes up to Louis’. What he finds turns his skin to fire and his mouth to ash. Louis is just as affected by what is happening as Harry. His eyes are wide, and his lips pink and wet from licking them. Harry doesn't speak, just stares  pleading with his eyes for something, anything. “I'm going to kiss you now,” is what Louis offers.  “But I can't stay. I have to go.” Harry nods slowly and closes his eyes, still making no effort to move. Then he feels lips on his, warm and wet. He immediately opens his mouth to let Louis take what he wants. Louis complies and threads a hand through the hair on the back of Harry's neck, pulling him closer.

And then the feeling is gone leaving Harry cold from losing Louis’ touch. He opens his eyes as Louis is standing up, leaving him alone on the floor once again. “Come back again tomorrow.” Louis asks. No, tells, commands. And then he rushes out the door. Harry only gets up from where he is kneeling when he hears the boisterous sound of Niall walking down the hall a half an hour later.

 

**

 

When Harry walks through the dark halls the next day there is no loud music to greet him. He can't decide if it's better or worse. He feels like Louis is lighting up a very big sign that says that he is waiting. He walks to the door, and puts his hand on the handle for a second, breathing deep through his mouth before pushing it open.

Louis immediately turns, his face is unreadable, envelopes in his hands. “You came.” He states. And yes, he came. Just like he came in his office bathroom after Louis had left him kneeling on the floor the morning before. He came like he did last night laying alone in bed wishing that someone would push him into the mattress and make him beg for it. He doesn't say that thought.

“Yes sir.” Slips past his lips instead, and a stain of blush colours his cheeks, but he doesn't shy away from it this time. He can see Louis’ eyes widen a little at the reference. But Louis doesn't flinch away either, and that gives Harry more hope than he cares to think about.

Louis walks towards him purposefully. Eyes never leaving Harry's. When he is close enough to practically crawl inside him, he stops. “I suppose you came looking for another kiss.” Louis smirks, but his eyes aren't laughing. They are piercing, and shiny. He's looking past Harry’s body, and into his soul.

“Yes….sir.” Harry whispers, eyes begging. Louis raises an eyebrow and takes a step back.

“Well, you are going to have to wait. Can you wait Harry?” Louis actually waits for an answer so Harry nods.

“Can you tell me? With your words?”

“Yes.” Louis looks curious, and Harry can feel his skin crawl at the scrutiny. He wants to submit to this man more than he wants to breathe right now. But he doesn't know if it’s mutual or not and he just can't assume.

“Well Harry, I need you to be really good for me. Really quiet. And no more messes like yesterday.” Louis’ tone is calm, like he isn't scared, he isn't worried by his boss’ behaviour. “Can you be good for me?”

Harry drops his head, because he can't drop his whole body for Louis. Not yet. He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to stave off the desire, get himself under control. Louis isn't making it easy. “I asked you a question.” Harry gasps for a bit of air before he looks at Louis again.

“Yes, yes I can be good for you.” Louis seems satisfied and nods.

“Sit down and be quiet. I will tell you when you can talk again, alright?” Harry is frantic for a second. Is he supposed to just sit where he is?  The ability to choose for himself is slipping, and the thought of making even such an easy decision is causing panic to rise in his chest.

Suddenly there is a delicate hand on his wrist, and he instantly melts into it. Louis leads him to an empty table. It's not long like the ones that Louis is using to sort his piles, but it's solid wood, and very sturdy.

“Take off your shoes, and sit up here, tuck your legs in.” Harry immediately obeys, and Louis praises him. “That's the way. Good.”

When Harry is settled, his hands are in his lap, his back is against the wall, and he has an excellent view of the entire room, especially Louis. The thought that Louis may have made this space for him floods into him like a warm bath, and he sinks into the feeling of being cared for, thought of. He smiles and feels serene, staring at Louis who makes sure he is going to be alright where he is.

“This okay?” Louis asks, and his tone is serious. He's not just asking about the comfort of the table.

“Yes sir.” Harry practically moans.

“Remember, very still, very quiet.” Louis looks him in the eye to make sure he understands. He nods this time because Louis didn't ask him this time. And Louis finally goes back to his tasks, leaving Harry to enjoy the view.

 

**

 

Louis tries his best to work on the task in front of him, but he can’t help but steal glances into the corner of the room. Harry is sitting still as a statue and seems to be very serene. The most relaxed that Louis has ever seen him in fact. He was so scared to say the wrong thing to him this morning, but he can’t help himself. He craves the feeling that Harry gives him when Louis is being...he doesn’t even know what. Bossy? Demanding? No, that isn’t it. It looks to Louis like Harry just needs someone to take the reins every once in awhile, and if the look on Harry’s face is the reward for that, Louis is all in. Not to mention, it’s hot as fuck.

The kiss on the floor the morning before caused more than one office blunder. He couldn’t focus on anything else but the feel of Harry’s lips under his, letting Louis just take him. His heart rate picks up just at the thought of it. He finally finishes his job for the morning and gives Harry his full attention.

Harry is still sitting still, and quiet. He looks practically like he’s sleeping, except his eyes are open, and settled intent on Louis. He walks up to the table so that his waist is pressed into the edge. Harry doesn’t move, doesn’t react to Louis at all, except from the intense stare. They stay that way for a few moments before Louis speaks.

“You can talk now.” He says quietly, and Harry smiles at him. A beautiful smile that pops a dimple out in his cheek. Louis has never seen it before, and he can’t stop staring at it. Harry does not, however, speak. “So, you like it when people tell you what to do?” Louis asks, more cheeky than he feels. Louis is nervous. Nervous because this is going to be a thing, or nervous because this is a thing that Louis has never done before, he doesn’t know.

“Not everyone.” Harry replies, and it’s rough, like he hasn’t spoken in days.

“Just me again?” Louis leans in, and Harry’s breath hitches.

“Yeah.” He replies, mostly whispers.

Louis kisses him again. He doesn’t ask this time, doesn’t feel like he has to. Harry reciprocates with his mouth, but leaves his body firmly still. It does something to Louis. It’s too much, but not enough at the same time. He breaks away with a gasp.

“Come closer.” Louis says, and Harry scoots to the edge of the table, unfolding his legs and hanging them down on either side of Louis’ torso. Louis puts his hands on Harry’s thighs, and it’s not sexual, but Louis can feel Harry still and calm under his touch.It’s almost intoxicating. “So if I tell you to do something like, email your arse to the entire staff, would you do it?” Louis gives him a cheeky look, and Harry chuckles slowly.

“I think you know the answer to that.” He replies, and it’s a relaxed voice, not strained or tight. Louis wonders if it’s because of what Louis did.

“But if I tell you to be still, and quiet, you will listen to me.” Louis enquires.

“You know the answer to that too.” Harry says, and Louis flushes a little.

“And you like it?” Louis looks Harry in the eye.

“A lot.” Louis kisses him again, and this time it’s different. Harry moves forward, letting his hands come up into Louis’ hair. It’s the first time that Harry has touched him, and Louis doesn’t want it to ever end.

“Are you going to come back?” Louis asks when they break away again, forehead resting on Harry’s.

“I am.” Harry says, with all of the confidence of a CEO that Louis hasn’t yet seen from him. Louis backs away, smiling.

“I have to go.”

“Me too.” Harry hops off the table. “Tomorrow?” He asks.

“I will be here.”

 

**

 

Harry is true to his word, and shows up before the sun is up every day that Louis is at work. Just seeing him fill in the doorway of the mail room, a fidgety mess, almost shy in his movements, uttering a quick yes sir when Louis tells him to sit quietly makes Louis’s stomach twirl with excitement. Harry always seems to feel better when they part ways, and Louis is always amazed that being in Louis’ presence does that to him.

Until about a week later, Louis is tending to his work when he hears a sudden shuffle on the table. He pops his head over because this is the first time Harry has actually done anything besides sit, and watch since they started whatever _this_ is. Harry’s cheeks are stained pink, and he looks like he had just did something so deplorable that Louis wants to go over and comfort him. But when Louis tries to smile over in Harry’s direction, Harry just frowns in disapproval. Oh. Louis wasn’t supposed to be happy that Harry had moved. Louis had given him an order. Louis slowly catches on to Harry’s train of thought. He hopes so anyway.

“I told you to sit quietly, Harry.” He tries to be stern, but it’s hard with the way Harry is looking at him. The look of peaceful quiet flits across his face once more though at Louis’ voice, and Louis thinks that he has done something right. He knows for himself when he suddenly has a tightening in his jeans just at the idea of being stern with Harry. He doesn’t have time to think about it because all of a sudden there is movement again, and Louis looks over to see Harry embarrassed once more for his fidgeting. This time Louis walks over to the table and confronts Harry. “Do you want to go?” He asks. He keeps his face serious, not wanting to keep Harry doing something he doesn’t want to. Harry’s eyes fly up in panic. He shakes his head no. “Words please.”

“No, I don’t want to go.” Harry pleads. Louis nods in understanding.

“So what happens if I tell you to do something, and you don’t do it?” Louis asks, genuinely curious. Harry’s eyes go wide, and if he wasn’t blushing so much already, Louis suspects that he would be blushing even more furiously right now.  “I can’t do it if you don’t tell me.”

Harry responds by holding out his wrists. Louis looks down at them for a second before taking them in his hands, holding Harry by the wrists, and Harry immediately huffs out a staggered breath. This is when Louis sees the bulge pushing against Harry’s thin suit trousers. He takes a deep swallow.

“This why you can’t sit still?” Louis points with his eyes to Harry’s crotch. They have never gone past kissing, haven’t really had time.

“Yes sir.” Harry breathes, and the desperate sound in his voice causes Louis’ own semi to jump to life.

“Do you think that you have earned an orgasm this morning?” Harry pauses, conflict in his eyes. Louis wants to tell him that of course he has, but he doesn’t really think that Harry would agree. He remembers the first day, the day that he spilled the mail, and how affected Harry was down on his knees and takes his hands from Harry’s wrists. “Maybe you should get down on your knees. Maybe that will earn you an orgasm.”

Harry moves so fast that Louis steps back to get out of his way. He gets down hard on his knees and bows his head, entire body facing Louis. And fuck, it’s beautiful. He has had men on their knees in front of him before, but this is different. This makes Louis want to hold Harry, keep him still, keep him right there until they are both sweating, and desperate with want. He tentatively reaches out to place a hand on the back of Harry’s taut neck, and by the way Harry’s body jutters, Louis thinks he isn’t that far from being a sweating mess anyway.

After a few moments, because Louis doesn’t think he can handle much more, he gets down on Harry’s level, not taking the hand off the back of his neck. “What do you want Harry?”

“Whatever you will give me.” Harry immediately responds.

“That isn’t how this is going to go. I will give you all of the orders that you want, but I am not just going to take take take I want to take care of you. I want to give you what you need.”

“I want to get off.” Harry whispers, almost sounding embarrassed for it.

“Okay. Get off then.” Louis backs away, and Harry shoots a look up to Louis, confused. “Stand up.” Louis instructs, Harry does what he is told. Louis moves for Harry’s trouser buttons, and Harry sucks in a breath at the skin to skin contact. Louis tries to not think about what he is doing before he pulls the trousers down, underwear and all. Harry is standing fully hard, and partially dressed in front of him, and Louis has to fight everything in him not to drop to his knees himself and tend to Harry’s throbbing erection. Instead he gets the clothes down just past Harry’s knees and backs away. “On the table.” Louis instructs. His voice is winded, and he can feel the sheen of sweat growing on his skin. He is on fire.

Harry complies. The trousers bind his legs up a little, and his isn’t able to sit like he normally does. He lifts his knees a little, but keeps them together so that they are not dangling off the table, and he waits. His eyes are wide, his arousal obvious all over his body, and Louis just wants to watch him. But Harry is waiting for more. Louis shakes himself out of his trance to look back to Harry with stern eyes. “Give me your hand.” Harry sticks out a hand immediately, and Louis turns it palm up. He dips his head down, almost carefully, knowing that Harry is watching his every move, and gently licks the entirety of his palm. He picks his head up, and steps back just a little. Just to get a better view. “I want to see you. I want to see you come. Can you do it?”

Harry nods his head, and brings his hand down to his throbbing dick. He starts pumping himself quietly, eyes squeezed shut in concentration. Louis reaches down to touch himself as well. “Harry.” He practically chokes out. “I want to hear you too. Let me hear how much you want it.”

Harry moans out as soon as Louis says the words, focusing on him, desperation still in his eyes. “Doing so well lovely. Want to see you fuck yourself. You are so beautiful.” Harry moans out again, and quickens the pace. Louis staves off his own orgasm, not wanting to make it about himself. He just wants to enjoy what is happening in front of him.

Suddenly Harry’s breath hitches. “I’m close.” Harry whines, and Louis doesn’t think. He just comes back in front of Harry and pulls his trousers all the way down to his ankles. Harry’s knees fall apart, and he takes Harry into his mouth. The noise that comes from both of them at the contact is primitive, and guttural. Louis pumps him with his mouth a few times. Before Harry is spurting into his mouth. The hot liquid and his moans on Harry’s lips tips him over the edge, barely even touching himself.

Louis pulls back, gasping for breath, and Harry slumps back into the wall. “That was… thank you… sir.” Harry is still in his head. But Louis can see that he is happy.

“Are you alright? Was that alright?” Louis asks, stroking Harry’s bare thigh. Harry just nods and smiles.

“Yes, that was...perfect.” Harry’s voice is slower and deeper than usual. Louis is quickly realising the mess on his clothes and pushes off of the contact that is keeping him in his spot.

“I am going to be so late for work today.” He half jokes, and Harry looks worried for a moment before he sees Louis’ smile.

“I should just go home because nothing will beat that.” Louis can see Harry start to come back to the normal self he usually is before he leaves Louis. It gives Louis an odd sense of comfort to know that they are ok before they part ways.

Harry hops off the table and pulls his clothes together, running a hand through his hair. He gives a pause to look hard at Louis. “Are you okay?” Which Louis didn’t really expect. 

“Y-Yeah, I am great. A little messy, but great. Thanks.” Harry just nods and plants a kiss onto Louis cheek before bidding him farewell for another day.

 

**

 

The pathway in front of Sonic’s stand is blissfully free of people. Harry attributes it to being the coldest day of the year so far. It’s just past December, and while it hasn't snowed yet, one would want to turn up their collars and rush to a warmer indoor destination than lounge out in the cold with a cup in their hand. Harry needs a chat though, and Sonic is blissfully unaware of the temperature with the small heater blasting in his direction, so he sticks around and talks.

“And it’s been...hot. Every day has been something new. And fuck, it’s like he was born to dom me, you know?” Harry looks to Sonic for confirmation, he smiles encouragingly, so Harry goes on. “And he is willing to do things that Andrew wasn’t, even when I asked. Louis just does them naturally. Like, holding me down, putting me on my knees because he knows that I like it.” He flushes a bit, wondering if he has gone too far. Sonic shoots him a familiar look. “I don’t know if I am ready yet. I don’t know if he is ready yet.” Harry looks in his almost empty cup, and frowns. “I should be happy with what I have. This should be enough, right?”

Sonic looks at him sympathetically. The way he looked at him when Andrew said no, and ultimately left. The way he looked at him when the need grew too much, and he had no way to release it. Harry doesn’t need that look now. He has what he needs...he thinks.

 

“You know, he hasn’t ever asked me for more. Never questions what we’re doing. He seems happy with where we’re at. Why can’t I?” The thought crosses Harry’s mind that maybe Louis is waiting for Harry to bring it up. But he pushes it away just as quickly. No, he has made up his mind. He will take what he can get, and be happy with it. Louis isn’t a dom, they aren’t in a relationship. This is good enough. “This is good enough.” He says out loud and ignores the frown on Sonic’s face.

“Anyway, thanks for the coffee.” He leaves a tip on the counter, and turns back towards the office.

 

**

 

The annual Styles & Styles Christmas party is in full swing. The entire event is housed on the creative department floor as it is mostly one large open space with little furniture to move around. Hundreds of people are milling around drinking, and dancing, and having a lovely time. Harry stands in the corner with a lukewarm drink in his hand next to his increasingly annoyed sister. The third time she leaves the wall to fill a small food plate, and he tries to follow her, she sighs so loud that he is sure their mother could hear them from Connecticut.

“Harry, could you just go and mingle?” she asks, exasperated. “Please.”

Harry frowns back at her. “You’re the one who makes me come to these things. No one here wants to talk to me.” He actually frowns now. He’s got somewhat of a reputation in the building for being a bit well, broody.  

Gemma softens her shoulders, and her face. “That is not true Harry.” She doesn’t look entirely convincing. “Besides, maybe if you tried to look a little more friendly, people would be more willing to approach you.”

That doesn’t really sound like an appealing option either, and his thoughts must show on his face because Gemma laughs. “Well, you can’t have it both ways, but at the end of the day, you are CEO of this company, and it’s good for moral if you make appearances here. So people know you’re invested in them, not just the business.”

“Fine, yes, but I am not staying long. And I am not fake smiling.” Harry warns, she laughs because she knows him well enough to have already figured that out.

“You’re also not following me around here like a lost puppy.” Gemma states, and walks off without him. Leaving Harry feeling vulnerable and alone.

He starts to retreat to his corner to avoid conversation again when a warm presence comes up behind him, close enough to whisper in his ear. “You look absolutely sinful.”

All of the air seems to leave Harry’s body and he can feel Louis discreetly settle him with a hand to the waist. He looks around frantically to see if anyone is watching, but they of course are not, all happily in their own little bubbles of friends and drink. He suddenly turns to be heard by Louis. “Follow me.” Harry promptly walks off, not waiting to see if Louis is following. When he makes it to a dark office that has a locked door, he takes out his master key, and opens it. What is the fun of having your own building if you can’t open all the doors, right? He leaves the light off, and waits, hopes that Louis is coming behind him. He doesn’t have to wait for long.

“Usually I am the bossy one between us.” Louis teases, and Harry smiles.

“Sorry.” He bows his head and puts his hands behind his back. It’s a natural instinct. He couldn't stop himself if he tried.

“That’s alright.” Louis pauses. It’s still dark, and all Harry can do is listen for his voice, his movements. “I didn’t expect you to be here tonight.” His voice is suddenly closer. Harry looks up, and can see that Louis is standing directly in front of him.

“Are you happy to see me?” Harry asks, his voice unintentionally shaky. He realises that Louis’ answer means a lot more to him than he would like to admit.

“Always happy to see you, lovely.” Louis puts his hand gently on Harry’s cheek. “We never have this much time to just, you know, talk.”

Talking is not what was on Harry’s mind, but he doesn’t say it. He just nods, and Louis moves his hand as he does so, brushing his thumb across Harry’s bottom lip. He dips his thumb into Harry’s mouth, and Harry instantly opens, wanting to give Louis whatever he wants.

“You don’t want to talk.” Louis states, and Harry flushes. “It’s naughty to lie, you know.” Louis’ voice is soft and stern at the same time, and Harry’s knees buckle a little with the need to kneel for him. He doesn’t though, because Louis didn’t ask him to.

“No...sir.” Harry dips his head again, but Louis brings it back up.

“Look at me Harry.” Harry does, Louis’ face is really close to his now. “I just need to know that this...this is enough for you. The sneaking around the mail room, and dark offices at Christmas parties. Is the sex, and...or whatever we are doing...is that enough for you?”

Harry’s mind immediately flicks to the many things that he wants, brain short-circuiting with _more more more_ . But he doesn’t know if he can ask Louis for those things, and if he can’t,then he can’t offer Louis anymore than he is already giving him either.

“We aren’t having sex.” He whispers instead, and Louis chuckles, although it sounds more dark than light.

“I told you that we’re not having sex while I am at work. I know that there is a thin line between what we do, and actual sex, but that’s a line, I would rather not cross.”

“You aren’t at work right now.” Harry replies, a little too quickly, a lot too eagerly.

“Too many people around.” Louis gets close again, runs his fingers up the back of Harry’s neck, and grips him on the good side of hard. “I want to be able to take my time with you.” He whispers into Harry’s ear.” Harry chokes out a gasp and leans fully into Louis, resting his head on Louis’ shoulder.

“Please, just come home with me. We can-- you can-- Please.” Harry can’t even form a full sentence like this. Louis is just everywhere, surrounding him, grounding him.

“Before we have sex, I have to know that it’s what you want Harry. Just sex, is that what you want from me?” He doesn’t say what he wants, and doesn’t tell Harry that he is looking for more, so Harry just nods.

“I just need...what you give me. Whatever you give me.” Louis doesn’t move for a moment, but eventually nods once, and backs away.

“I want to stay for another hour. No drinking. Are you okay to go back out there?” Louis looks at him curiously. Harry nods quickly, and stands up straight, adjusting his jacket. Louis gives him a once over, and walks out of the room without another word.

 

**

 

For Louis, the hour both drags and goes at lightning speed. He feels like he’s going to be an old man before the minutes tick away, but then all of a sudden he is faced with the imminent challenge of Harry Styles. He has been fantasizing about this moment from the day he’d met the man, but as the weeks have passed, and things progressed between them, the fantasies became a lot more...creative. He didn’t actually think that he would be able to fulfill theses, but going home with the man changes things. It’s not stolen moments here and there anymore.

He spends the hour reveling in the effect he has on Harry. He gives him silent commands, shooting him teasing glances. Harry tries to keep his eyes off of Louis’ constantly moving form, but he doesn’t well succeed, and by the time the hour is up, and Louis is waiting for Harry to come into the dimly lit main lobby, they are both a lot more turned on than deemed appropriate for public.

Harry immediately comes into Louis’ arms as his driver takes them to Harry’s home. The kiss Louis gives him is passionate and hot, making him forget the world around them. All he can see it the man in front of him, a combination of strength and weakness, overall a needy mess. In this moment, he has no doubts about where he belongs, or that he is exactly there.

When they finally stop, Louis takes his surroundings in, and holy shit. “I guess I knew that you had money. But...wow.” Louis doesn’t even think that he has ever seen a place this expensive. Harry just looks at him anxiously..

“Is this a problem?” Harry asks and Louis kisses the wariness away.

“No Harry, it doesn’t change anything. This isn’t who you are where it counts.” Harry smiles, and they both get out of the car to enter the large modern building, set in Park avenue.

“If it makes you feel any better, this is probably one of the least expensive apartments on the entire street.” Harry looks back at him as he enters the code into the building.

“Starving artist are you H?” Louis teases, causing Harry to blush.

“No one looks at me and sees an artist anymore.” Harry admits. “Just a businessman.”

“You are properly art, I do know that.” Louis attaches his lips to the back of Harry’s neck. A graze of his teeth against soft skin stalls Harry, and Louis has to break away again just to get them into the building.

When they make it into the large, but sparsely furnished apartment, Harry turns to Louis to stare. It’s like a standoff between them, a fight for power. Louis can see Harry’s brain spinning with all the things that he wants from Louis, but Louis also has a strong sense that he will never ask, which is both frustrating and incredibly arousing because Louis can see Harry willing himself to trust him to take care of them both.

“God, you are so beautiful Harry.” He breathes out. Harry stays still, eying Louis still, almost like a caged animal, staying guarded and wary. He licks his lips and pushes on. “Is this… I want to… like before?” He doesn’t know how to ask Harry what he wants. Does Harry want Louis to tell him what to do? To boss him around in the bedroom too? Or is that reserved for when he is feeling jumpy and out of sorts?

Harry responds by walking up to Louis and kneeling down at his feet. It puts all of Louis’ nerves on end, and he reaches down to approach Harry’s head to his thighs, just to ground himself. “Okay.” Louis whispers and tries to compose himself enough to take care of Harry. “Let’s go to your bedroom. We can start in there.” He tries to sound more authoritative, and Harry immediately gets up and goes in a direction that Louis assumes is his room. The apartment is massive, and Louis tries not to get distracted on his way through, mostly by the view outside the windows. They are almost all bare or have the drapes open to reveal the a beautiful view all round him.

He follows Harry into a door that reveals a bedroom, also mostly empty, save a massive bed, two nightstands, a full length mirror, and a plush armchair. Harry is standing at the end of the bed, staring again. Louis immediately walks up to him and kisses him on the mouth, long, deep, and lazy. Harry reciprocates like it’s everything to him, and Louis has to place his hands on Harry’s hips to break away from him.

“Harry,” he gasps. “I need you to get undressed.” He takes a step back to give Harry the space he needs to oblige immediately. His usual attire of black and white and silk scarves is tossed aside on the armchair, and Harry stands magnificently in front of him. Naked, and not at all bothered by it, with only just a hint of vulnerability that makes him both god and human. Louis reaches out, can’t help it, and traces his finger along the lines of Harry’s butterfly tattoo. It causes Harry’s abs to contract, and his skin to goosebump, but he doesn’t move.

“I want to do so much for you, Harry.” Harry gasps in a breath. “But tonight, I just want to feel you. Wanna fuck you, make you remember me tomorrow. Is that what you want?” He can see the hesitation in Harry’s eyes before he nods.

“Yes.” He hisses out, his erection  filling harder with every one of Louis’ words.

“I want to try one thing tonight though. If you are up for it.” Louis adds on, and Harry nods so fast that Louis worries he’s going to hurt himself. “Okay, lay on the bed, face down please.” Louis tells him, and Harry complies, turning his head to keep watching Louis. He unbuttons his shirt and crawls up the bed behind Harry, rubbing his hands up his the back of Harry’s thighs gently. He kisses his back, and can feel Harry’s breaths increasing, and his heart rate along with it.

“I am going to make you come with just my fingers. Open you up really good and make you wet for me. Then I am going to fuck you long and hard, do you want that?” His voice slurs like he is drunk, and Harry lets out an involuntary moan in response. “But you have to  be still for me, Harry. No moving, no grinding. And no coming until I tell you, alright?” Harry nods. “I asked you a question.”

“Yes, yes sir. Please.” Harry practically begs, voice sharp.

“Okay, where is your lube?” Louis asks. Harry points at his night stand, and Louis goes and finds what he needs.  

He wastes no time, rucking Harry’s hips up, so that there is no friction between him and the bed, Harry lets out a little whine in protest that Louis just tsks, and Harry quiets down immediately. He lubes his finger up and rubs over Harry’s hole a couple of times, feeling it pucker under his touch before he pushes in. Harry breathes in, motionless, as Louis pushes in and out. Before he adds another, Louis is careful to coat Harry in lube profusely, however that doesn’t prevent Harry from tensing up, but by the look on his face, it’s just in an effort to not move. He’s not moving because Louis told him not to move. The rush of power makes him feel dizzy and overheated, almost like he’s running a fever and that’s not even mentioning how hard he got once he let that information sink in.  

By the third finger, Harry is panting and making small movements against Louis’ fingers, incapable of holding back any longer. Louis is just as affected, not sure he’s going to be able to fulfill his promise of giving Harry an orgasm before he has one of his own. He has to though. _Has to_ . So he powers on to push into Harry’s prostate. Harry opens his mouth in a silent gasp, and Louis can’t take it anymore. “Want to hear you, Harry.” Harry immediately cries out.

“Please, please, please. Lou, please. Fuck.” Harry blurts out all at once. Louis keeps fucking into him with his fingers while Harry babbles on. The begging makes Louis forget himself a little, so when Harry starts to push back on Louis’ fingers,  he has to pull out, leaving Harry whining, and open.

“Be still Harry, or I’ll make you.” Louis scolds, and with that Harry cries out, on the verge of orgasm. Louis is far from actually done with him so he reaches between his legs to cut it off, hand squeezing at Harry’s base almost bruisingly. It causes Harry to beg again.

“Please Lou, sir. Please. Wanna come.”

“You want to come, do you? You’re not acting like you want it. Being very greedy Harry.” Louis pushes all three fingers in and starts pumping relentlessly once again, choking off the pleas. He then uses the hand that was staving off Harry’s orgasm and starts pumping him in rhythm with his fingers. Harry is a sweating mess by now, and all Louis has to say is, “Come for me Harry” for him to start spurting up the bed, onto himself, onto the sheets. Harry is sobbing and gasping for air, but Louis doesn’t stop because as much as Harry whines and wiggles, he doesn’t tell him to stop. So Louis pumps him until he starts to get hard again and then, he pulls away.

“On your back Harry.” Louis instructs him, and Harry rolls over like it was the last bit of energy left in him. He is messy with his own come, his eyes are wet with tears, but he is smiling dreamily at Louis. “

“I am going to fuck you now. Alright?” Harry just nods, and doesn’t move. Louis moves off the bed to get rid of the rest of his clothes and quickly gives himself a few pumps before he puts on the condom he found in the drawer. He looms over Harry and kisses him again. A little more tender than last time, but still full of want. He pulls one of Harry’s legs up and opens the space between them a little before he slides himself in. There is little resistance, thanks to Louis’ careful prep, but the new intrusion still causes Harry to arch his back in pain, and pleasure Louis is assuming. His cock is still pink and shiny from his last orgasm, filling up with Louis’ attention.

“Feel so good for me Harry.” He grits out, as he bottoms out. Harry only whines in response, and tries to move Louis in even further. “ Such a good boy, aren’t you, trying to make me feel good too aren’t you?”

“Yes, yes, want you to feel good, Lou. Fuck, yes, want you so much.” Harry mumbles out. Louis can only understand every other word, but he gets the idea. He start pumping into him, wondering if he should even bother to make it last. Harry looks spent as it is.

“Think you can come for me again, baby?” Louis fucks into him with increasing intensity.

“I don’t know, please, want to.” Harry pleads. Louis shift so that he is thrusting up into Harry, and gets his prostate, causing Harry to shout out.

“Please, please, please.” He begs, cock getting rock hard. Louis grabs him, and starts pumping roughly, probably too rough for the state that Harry is already in, but Harry just pushes up into him more, wanting it.

“Come Harry, want you to come first.” Louis tells him, keeping himself right on the edge, waiting. Harry doesn’t come on command this time, but takes a few more minutes, driving Louis absolutely crazy. But when he does Louis can feel his entire body tense around him, like the orgasm is being ripped straight out of him. Louis lets go too, fucking him through his own orgasm, and then collapses beside Harry who is a sweating, heaving mess.

They lay there for a few minutes, catching their breath before Harry curls into a clinging ball against Louis side. “Thank you.” He practically whispers.

“Anytime H.” He replies before his eyes close, and he drifts off.

 

**

 

Harry is roused awake sometime later, he doesn’t know. It’s still dark, but there is a gentle nudge on his shoulder. He looks over and sees Louis smiling gently at him. He smiles back instinctively. He reaches up, and gently touches the sharp curve of Louis’ jaw, and can feel Louis moving into it. He doesn’t curl in for a kiss like Harry had hoped.

“I am going to go.” Louis says in a whisper, although they are alone in the apartment. Harry’s smile instantly turns to a frown.

“Why? You can stay.” His voice sounds pleading, and Louis almost looks sad. It’s not a pleasant feeling.

“I don’t want it to be weird in the morning.” He says, like it makes all the sense. Harry is not convinced. He sits up to be face to face with Louis. He’s already fully dressed, ready to walk out the door.

“Why would it be weird?” He more accuses than asks.

“This,” Louis gestures between the two of them. “It’s casual, physical. We have never actually had a real conversation. I thought that’s what you wanted.”

And he isn’t wrong. That is exactly what Harry had told Louis he wanted. Just sex, and whatever it is that Louis was able to give him. Because if it was more than Harry would have to face what he had been dreading. Telling Louis what he needs, and Louis rejecting him. He nods slowly, and looks back to Louis, who seems more worried, than pitying.

“You’re right. Of course. I will see you at work, maybe.” Louis’ eyebrows knit together, and he leans into Harry again.

“No, I am not leaving until I know you are okay. I woke you because I didn’t want you to think I  snuck off. I like what we have. I want to continue. But I can’t do that if you look like this when we part ways.” Louis puts his hand on Harry’s cheek, and kisses his mouth gently. “Nothing has changed H, I will still be in the mailroom, and I will still give you what you need. All you have to do is ask. If you want anything. Just ask.”

Harry wants to hear a hidden meaning in Louis’ words, like if he asks Louis to be his dom, Louis would say yes, or if Harry asks Louis to enter an entire lifestyle Harry is sure Louis knows nothing about, he would say yes. But Harry can’t entertain false hope..he can let himself hear that Louis is happy right now however. Louis will be there tomorrow. Louis leaving doesn’t mean that it’s over. So he smiles tentatively, and nods again.

“That sounds good.”

Louis smiles in relief. “Yeah?” Louis asks again for confirmation.

“I will see you after the weekend.” Harry confirms, thinking about their morning routine already sends a shiver down Harry’s body.

“Well...” Louis hesitates for a second, but extends his hand, and passes Harry a piece of paper. “I am not doing anything this weekend. Feel free to call.” Louis is giving him his number.

Harry smiles wider, accepting it as the gift it is. “Or not, it’s up to you. I am sure you are busy.” Louis adds on, and Harry kisses him this time.

“I will call you. Thank you.” With this Louis gets up, only giving a small wave in Harry’s direction before he walks out the door.

 

**

 

Harry wakes up later the next morning, still feeling Louis all over his body. It’s a mix of bitter and sweet. Sated from good sex, and the feeling of a strong man took care of him, but at the same time, waking up alone could be one of the most disconcerting things he has felt in a while. He looks at the crumpled piece of paper lying on his night stand, and wonders how long he has to wait until he can call Louis.

 

Two minutes? Two hours?

He makes it until just past noon. He feels like he s going to pulls his fingers off from wringing his hands together, and he’s going run a groove into the floor from pacing. He’s not wound up, not like before, but for some reason, calling Louis just makes him nervous. It’s like if he calls, then he is admitting his need. He’s not just showing up, and letting Louis take the lead. He’s making a step in a direction, and he isn’t sure whether it’s the right one or not. But while his mind is screaming caution, his body is screaming Louis.

_LouisLouisLouis._

In the end, his fingers just dial.

Harry is sitting in the middle of his bed, still in his underwear when he presses the phone up to his ear and hears it ring for the first time. His throat tightens when he hears the second. His stomach starts to drop when he hears the third, until there is a little click, and a gentle “Hello?”

Harry pauses, almost caught off guard, as though he didn’t actually expect Louis to answer the phone. “Hi.” He finally manages to choke out, but that is about as far as he gets before there is silence again.

“Harry?” Louis’ voice sounds more concerned than anything, and Harry feels utterly ridiculous for being so nervous to talk to a man who he has literally fallen to his knees for. But Louis just has this habit of taking his breath away.

“Yes, it’s me. Hello.” He sounds stiff, and formal to his own ears. He squeezes his eyes shut, and runs his fingers through his hair, pulling a little to ground himself. It helps, if only a little.

“I’m glad you called.” Louis sounds nothing but pleasant, and soft, like he was curled up in bed himself, maybe reading a good book.

“Are you?” He tries to not sound as desperate as he feels, but he can hear Louis’ soft chuckle, and knows that he didn’t succeed.

“Of course. I had a great time last night.” Harry can hear the familiar smirk in his voice. It comforts him. This is the Louis that he knows. Cocky Louis, he can work with.

“Me too.” Harry sighs, smiling. There’s another silence, but for some reason this one isn’t so tense.

“So, are you interested in seeing me again this weekend?” Louis asks. Harry is sure that Louis was waiting for Harry to say it, but he can’t. He just can’t ask Louis for this.

“Please.” He manages to say. “Tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I can see you tomorrow. How about I come over?”

“Yes, please that would be wonderful.” Harry replies sincerely.

“I'll see you tomorrow then Harry.” Louis says, which sounds a lot like a goodbye, so Harry swallows his nerves and just goes for it.

“Louis?”

“Yes?”

“What….what should I wear?” He holds his breath.

There is a pause at the other end, and a slight clearing of his throat. “I don't know. Just… just be ready for me.”

Harry can hear the smirk, the innuendo. Louis is acknowledging what their time together is about. It sends a thrill through Harry's skin, raising goosebumps over his flesh. Harry whispers a choked out “Yes sir” before he hangs up. He doesn't even know if Louis heard it. He can't bring himself to care.

 

**

 

The next afternoon, Harry is sitting in his living room, staring at the impressive skyline out his big picture window. The apartment is overwhelmingly silent, but he is taking advantage of waiting for Louis to prepare himself. He chose a comfortable, loose white t shirt so thin it shows  most of his newer tattoos, and a pair of light gray sweat pants. He passed the socks, enjoying the deep, thick, white rug under his bare toes. There are a few flakes in the air, the first of the season. Harry can almost say he feels at peace in this moment.

That is, until there is a ringing at the main door, requesting a guest be let up. A Mr. Tomlinson. Harry can feel every nerve, every muscle in his body start to coil again in anticipation,  and he's almost on his hands and knees by the time the soft knock comes to his door.

“Come in.” Harry calls out. He doesn't know if he even trusts himself to stand.

The handle turns, and suddenly there is Louis. Looking chilled, and pink from the cold. Harry just stares while he does away with his coat, and shoes. He looks around,  presumably for the occupant of the apartment, and he stills when he spots Harry sitting in the middle of the couch.

Harry has his legs tucked up under him like he did most mornings in the mailroom. He keeps his eyes on Louis while he comes into the room and stands fully in front of him.

“Hi.” Louis greets Harry with a smile. He has his arms folded in front of him, and his legs parted wider than necessary. With a look that almost looks like he's wondering what he's going to do with Harry.

“Hello.” Harry bows his head, feeling himself  pink up under Louis’ intense glare.  

“Not sir today?” Louis asks point blank, and Harry full on blushes at this.

When Harry doesn't answer, Louis squats down in front of him, so that Harry will look at him in the eye. “It’s whatever you want Harry. I don't mind. Like, really a lot don't mind.” Louis flushes a little too, and it makes Harry smile.

“Yes, you are sir today.” Harry manages, it comes out rough and forced, but Louis is satisfied.

“Okay,” Louis stands again, rubbing his hands together.  “Well, if it’s up to me then, I would like to see a little more of you.” He reaches out and tugs at the sleeve of Harry t shirt. “And maybe in the bedroom if you don't mind.” His voice is authoritative, but almost forced into being so. It doesn't happen often, and Harry gets the feeling that Louis is just trying to say what he thinks will please him.

He looks up, through hooded eyes, and licks his lips. “Is that really what you want...sir?” And just like that Louis’ expression changes. He instantly looks hungry, and needy. Harry can see him swallow, his Adam's apple bobbing slowly.

“Bedroom.” And the real Louis is back, real and raw.

Harry quickly stands and walks to the bedroom. He can feel Louis behind him, calm and assertive. As soon as they get inside the walls of the room Louis spins him with one jerk of Harry's arm.  When they’re face to face again, Louis pulls Harry in for a kiss. It's deep and rough, and Harry sinks into it. But as quickly as it starts,  Louis ends it by pulling back, and pulling Harry's shirt over his head. Then his joggers. He only pause for a second when he sees that Harry isn't wearing any underwear.

“On the bed. Hands and knees.” Louis says, eyes scraping over Harry's body like he's desperate for it.

Harry takes a little longer to obey this order. He turns his back in Louis, who just stands and watches, fingers twitching. He slowly sinks one knee into the bed, then the other, and shuffles up to the center. He only looks back for a moment to see Louis staring,  eyes blazing, and chest expanding deeply. He bends at the waist and places his hands on the bed and presses his face down low while keeping his knees straight. Behind him he can hear a soft “fuck” coming from Louis.

“Jesus; Harry. You're wearing…” All Harry can do is whine into the quilt on the bed as he feels the bed dip behind him,  and a warm hand slide up the curve of his exposed ass.

He prepped himself just as Louis asked him to.He found his favourite plug, a stainless steel little thing with a sparkly pink heart that peeks out when he bends over. He wanted to look good for Louis. He wanted to be ready.

“Can I touch it?” Louis asks.

“Yes, please sir. Please.” Harry begs, and is rewarded with Louis gently pressing it, moving it inside of him. He pushes back, trying to get as much traction as possible.

“Stay still.” Louis barks out. It's not abrasive,  just hungry, wanting, needing. Harry wants too. He wants to be good for Louis. He stills immediately, sinking back into the bed as Louis explores, and plays with him.

Finally Louis stops his prodding, and leans over Harry. He can feels Louis clothes, and it makes him feel all the more exposed being in display for Louis when Louis could easily stand up and walk out the door with no issues to his dress.

“I think you can come from just this plug.” Louis says. Harry whimpers, and squeezes his eyes shut. “You don't want to come?” The voice is teasing.

“Wanna come. Want you.” Harry slurs, trying so hard to stay still. Every move Louis makes causes the plug to shift as his knees keeps him balanced. He wants Louis’ cock. Not the plug.

“I don't know if you get me yet.” Louis brings his hand back onto Harry's back, and presses down, causing Harry's back to arch even further, causing the plug to move deeper. “You see. All I can imagine is you laying on this bed, fingerings yourself,  lubing yourself, and pushing this pretty little plug in. And I didn't even get to watch. Fuck, I bet that looked obscene. I want my turn at the fun. So you are going to come from the plug. Then we will see about coming from my cock alright?”

Harry nods. “Yes, yes sir, please.”

Louis leans back, but instead of touching Harry again, he gets off the bed. Harry can hear him undressing, and then open Harry's nightstand. When he gets back on the bed, and touches Harry's hole again, his fingers are lubed up. He presses into Harry's again, holding him still with the other hand on his lower back. Then  he starts to slowly pull it out, letting Harry's hole stretch around the bulb of the plug, but not fully allowing it to come out before Louis lets it suck back into him.

It's a few minute of Louis half fucking him, half grinding the toy into him when Harry is all but crying with want, all hopes of being still completely lost.

“Harry, I've told you too many times to be still. If I have to tell you again, I'm tying you to this bed.”

Harry is quite sure that he whites out, as the orgasm is ripped out of him. He cries out Louis’ name as he bucks into the bed until every ounce of the high is out of him. He doesn't even realise that Louis has played with him throughout until he suddenly stops pushing the plug into him, and unceremoniously pulls it out.  Harry squeals out with the force of it, but losing the plug means that he's open and gaping. He pushes up again, looking for more friction, and Louis obliges with a finger.

“Please,” Harry croaks out. Louis pauses his movements.  “Don't be gentle.” And he can hear the hitched breath behind him, and a condom wrapper ripping.

Suddenly Harry is being flipped onto his back, and Louis is on top of his chest, kissing his mouth.  Harry can feel their sweat mingle on their faces. Louis only pulls back enough to lift one of Harry's legs towards his chest, and for Louis to enter him steadily.  

“Like it rough?” Louis asks almost like it's a challenge. Harry nods, and pushes back into Louis who is quickly picking up the pace.

Louis is everywhere, on him, in him, surrounding all of Harry's senses. Suddenly he's pushing Harry's hands above his head with both of his own. Delicate hands grips his wrists, as Louis goes into his own head, chasing his own orgasm. The feeling of being pinned down, and doing this to Louis causes Harry to get hard again easily.

 

Louis doesn't take long with his own orgasm,  pumping into Harry so hard that it shifts the bed. But he doesn't slow down. As soon as he comes down off his high he dips down and takes Harry fully into his mouth. Harry keeps his hands over his head, but bucks up into Louis once, twice, three times before he's releasing. Louis takes is all, swallowing discreetly before climbing back up Harry's body to give him a chaste kiss on the jaw. Harry moves his head to kiss him on the mouth, and Louis sinks into him before rolling onto his back in a heaving slump.

“Good, so good.” Louis pants out with a laugh.

“It will do.” Harry says solemnly, then suddenly bursts into a fit of giggles along with Louis.

 

**

 

The next morning is a monday, and as usual, Louis is mindlessly sorting through the endless stacks of papers that were left for him on Friday afternoon. He hears the door opening behind him, and doesn’t have to turn around to see who is standing there. Although he must say he’s kind of surprised. He stops his work to give Harry his full attention.

Harry is back to his normal, formal business attire, and Louis can’t help but wonder if _business is back_ all the way through, or if Harry has anymore surprises under his suit. It’s worth to ask even if there is nothing he could do about that here anyway. Thinking about it is just t frustrating. Especially since Louis can see plain as day that Harry’s body language screams uncertainty right about now.  

Louis walks straight to him and doesn’t hesitate to wrap his hand around the back of his neck, bringing him down for a kiss that he hopes is clear enough to show him where Louis stands. Harry instantly melts into it and Louis has to break away to keep things from going too far. Harry smiles, sweet and genuine, and Louis smiles back, happy to see some of the tension leave Harry’s shoulders just from his touch.

“What do you need, baby?” Louis lets the term of endearment slip out. It’s futile though. He knows Harry won’t tell him what he needs, not really. Louis searches his eyes anyway, looking for something. All he finds is pleading on Harry’s open face. “Wanna be good for me?” Harry nods his head so fast Louis worries that he’s going to hurt himself. “Table or floor today?” --He’s basically speaking to himself at this point-- Then he smiles as he thinks of something he hasn’t tried before. “You have a beautiful bum.” He reaches a hand down and gives it a not so gentle squeeze. Harry all but whimpers at the contact, and Louis very much wants to cry along with him.

Instead, he grabs Harry by the wrist and leads him to the familiar table, empty and waiting, and pulls Harry into another passionate kiss that leaves them both breathless before he pulls away again. “You were quite the tease yesterday, showing me that plug, making me imagine you pushing it into yourself, and not letting me watch.” Harry blushes, but Louis can see the hint of pride in his eyes. Like he knows how much he affected Louis, how much Louis loved the surprise. “I think as a punishment,” Louis can feel Harry’s entire body go stiff at the word, and Louis tucks that piece of information away for later. “As your punishment, I think for the next ten minutes, you will stand here, bent over the table, so I can look at your ass whenever I want. Then, when the ten minutes are up, I will give you a reward if you’ve been good.” Louis sees Harry itching to do what Louis just asked, but he doesn’t move, he just stands there, curious, with the pink flush on his cheeks, waiting. “Do you think you can be good for me?”

“Yes, sir.” Harry speaks for the first time since he walked into the room. Louis nods once, and then lines Harry’s hips up with the table. Harry’s long legs make the table comes just about at the bend in his waist. Just below his groin. Louis then puts his hand on Harry’s back, and gently presses him towards the flat table until Harry’s face is flush against the cool surface. He steps back to inspect his work, making sure Harry is comfortable, and then stands behind him.

“If you can’t do this Harry, you have to tell me.” He looks Harry in the eye, and he can tell that Harry is already going into his own head, like he does sometimes when Louis gets him to do things like this. But he nods anyway. “Say the words.” Louis says, tone deliberately sharp, to make sure Harry is listening.

“I will tell you.” Harry sounds mechanical, but he’s still looking at Louis, and that is all Louis can really ask for.

After that, Louis tries to work, he really does, but Harry’s ass is there, and out, and he’s standing so perfectly still that Louis can’t stand it. So Louis makes his way back to the table minutes later at most. He doesn’t mean to touch, he tells himself that he is just coming over to check that Harry is alright, but the soft curve that Harry’s silky soft trousers make just calls for his hand to smooth the fabric over.

He doesn’t even know if Harry notices him standing here. Harry seems off in his mind, thinking God knows what, but when his skin finally makes contact with skin, Harry sighs deep, like he’s been anticipating it all along. Maybe he has been. Maybe Harry knew the plan before Louis himself.

“Don’t move, your time isn’t up.” Louis says.

“Yes, sir.” Harry slurs out without prompt. It’s a rare occurrence for Harry to speak without Louis expressly demanding it so Louis rewards him by squeezing harder on the soft flesh of his rear. Harry moans, and grinds himself into the table. Louis promptly removes his hand.

“Ah ah. It hasn’t been ten minutes yet. I get to move. You do not.” When Harry finally stills Louis can see that his hands are wrapped around the edge of the table over his head. His knuckles are white, and there is a deep crease in his forehead, but he isn’t moving. Louis tentatively puts a hand on his back that Harry sinks into. “Good boy.” Louis says, practically to himself. He can hear Harry puff out breaths, and he moves his hand up closer to the center of his shoulders to apply pressure there. Harry bends so easily to Louis’ touch. He doesn’t have to push, or ask, he can just touch, and Harry moves in any direction that Louis wants, like a rag doll. He moves his hand up to Harry’s hair, bending slightly over his body to reach, and runs his fingers through the shortest bit in the back before he tugs. Just a little. Harry’s head is up in an instant, and Louis keeps him moving until he is off the table, and on his knees in front of Louis.

Harry looks absolutely wrecked by now, eyes glassy, lips swollen and red like an invitation. His cock is pressing hard against the fly of his trousers. “God, you look so fucking beautiful right now, Harry. There are so many things I want to do to you looking like this.” He reaches for his own aching cock, and Harry follows his hand, swallowing like he’s about to take a bite of his favourite food. “Do you want to get off, H?” He asks like he’s actually curious, like he doesn’t know the answer to that already.

“Please.” Harry whines against Louis’ legs.

Louis still has a handful of Harry’s hair, although it’s mostly to stroke the back of his neck but he doesn’t want to lose the grip, so he uses the other hand to unbutton his jeans, and pull himself out. Without another word, he guides Harry’s mouth to his throbbing dick, and Harry takes it eagerly. The sudden heat of his mouth feels amazing as is watching Harry on his knees. But there’s something to be said about a man letting Louis fuck himself in his mouth with his hand holding him. It’s a lot, it’s too much in fact, because it doesn’t take more than a few strokes for Louis to be shooting down Harry’s throat. Just the way Harry likes it. He holds him there while he rides the high of his orgasm, and then when he looks down he sees it. Harry has come. Just from Louis handling him. It’s not the first time it’s happened, but it still amazes Louis whenever it does.

He sinks down onto the floor with Harry for a minute to catch his breath. Harry slowly starts to move and fidget beside him, and he turns a sleepy eye towards him. “I didn’t expect to see you today.” Harry looks over at him with a bit of uncertainty.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I will never turn you away, I love seeing you. I just thought that we were past the mailroom. There are so many more… opportunities if we were someplace else. Like your bed.” Harry smiles sheepishly, and Louis can tell that he is remembering the day before.

“So you would rather do this in a more private place.” Harry asks, but it’s not a question. He gets it.

“I will do this wherever, and whenever you need me to do it.” Louis isn’t just talking about the orgasms here. Louis suspects Harry knows it too. “I just said that I was surprised.” 

Harry nods. “So where do we go from here?”

“Well, right now, I go home and take a shower. You somehow manage to start a whole day of work in come stained pants. Then maybe you can call me. Or I can call you. This doesn’t have to be complicated, H. I have never really done this before, but I am willing to try.”

“Done what?” Harry immediately asks, brows creased, body tensing beside Louis.

“I don’t know, this whole sex with no strings thing. I’ve never done that. I am a relationship kind of guy. But this is good. It’s different. I am not asking you for anything. If that’s what you’re worried about. I just don’t want you to feel like I am trying to get more out of it than you’re willing to give.”

“No,” Harry shakes his head. His eyes aren’t as worried, but he still looks serious. “That’s not the problem. I am not worried about that.”

Louis wants to scream, and ask him what it is that he is worried about then, but he knows that he won’t find out. Not now, maybe not ever, and he has to be fine with that. He has to accept that there are parts of Harry that he may never see. He agreed to that, and he has to respect that agreement. So he nods, and picks himself up off the floor, reaches for Harry’s hand, and lifts him up. Harry comes easily. He looks better.

He always looks better leaving than coming in.

Louis takes some pride in that. Getting off before your workday starts every morning probably has its perks.

“I will text you with my schedule. We’ll work something out?” He asks hopefully. Harry nods, and smiles. Louis kisses him, more tenderly this time, and he can feel Harry smiling against it before he walks out, swaying his hips a little.

Louis is sure it’s for him.

 

**

 

It’s well into January, and the air is mild, and moist. That usually means one thing in New York: Snow is coming. But Louis decides to take advantage of the bit of a rise in temperature to visit his favourite coffee stand for his lunch break.

“Sonic, my man. How’s life treating you?” Sonic just smiles, as he does. Never in a bad mood that one. “How are you always so happy? Standing out here in the freezing cold every day?” He doesn’t answer, but he pats one of the few heaters in the enclosure on the way by. “Well, I am in a good mood too, and I don’t need heat to put a smile on my face.” Louis can see Sonic rolling his eyes, even from the back of his head. “If you don’t want the gory details, just speak up!” Louis sing songs. Sonic does turn around at that, and Louis almost thinks that he has cracked the enigma when the man simply points to his little sign. _Lay It On Me_ . “Fine, you asked for it.”

He doesn’t go into great detail, and not for the benefit of Sonic’s ears either. He does have some respect for privacy, and even though he does strangely trust this man at the coffee stand, he isn’t going to engage in anything locker room related. He does speak a lot about how the new experience is affecting him though.

“I have never felt so in control and out of control at the same time. Like, he wants me to almost use him to make me feel good, but all I ever do is things that make him feel good. It’s a very strange dynamic. I have never worked harder trying to make someone else come. I swear to God. It’s like an addiction. A sweet, tasty, delicious addiction that likes to be manhandled.” Sonic slips him a scowl l. “I’m not the one keeping it that way, you know? So keep your judgmental looks to yourself. I am not pushing him either. He needs… something. I don’t know. He’s not like anyone I’ve ever met.” Sonic proceeds to flutter his lashes at Louis, and smiles so deep that Louis can’t see his eyes anymore. “You know what, fuck you. I come for the coffee, not the attitude.” Sonic rolls his eyes, but smiles, and Louis smiles back.

They both know exactly what Louis comes for.

 

**

 

It’s a cold day in February and Harry has been stuck in his office since 6 am. Their spring line is just about ready to launch, and Harry feels like he’s been doing nothing but staring at a computer screen, and talking to people with suits and frowns lately. When he shares this anecdote with Gemma, she kindly reminds him that he is also a man in a suit and a frown, because what are sisters for? He’s feeling the familiar tension between his shoulders telling him that he’s reaching his breaking point for the day when he looks up and sees that it is only 2 pm. He swears to himself, and keeps typing.

He doesn’t expect the knock at the door, and the interruption instantly annoys him, until he looks up and sees that it is Niall. “Hey Niall, is everything alright?” He asks, a little worried. Normally Niall never comes to the top floor. Niall just smiles, and holds up a paper bag, and a familiar cup.

“I have it on good authority that your day was going to be crazy today, and you may need someone to bring you a little pick me up.” He sets the bag and the cup down on Harry’s desk. t’s his favourite order from Sonic’s coffee stand.

“Sonic put you up to this?” The tone is incredulous, borderline mocking.

“No.” Niall looks at him a little strange, a little fond. “Louis did. He asked me to check up on you. He has some big test today, and couldn’t come himself.” Harry stares at the food, a little confused, a little in awe. He did tell Louis that it was going to be a crazy week. it was just one of those things, in passing. Mostly just to let him know that he wouldn’t be around for a few days.

“I wasn’t expecting this.” He replies, a little dumbfounded. Niall laughs.

“You look like it. It’s just lunch though.” Niall gives him a knowing look. “Nothing to be scared of. Eat up. Don’t let the coffee get cold. Best in the city that is.”

“Don’t I know it.” Harry takes a large sip. The temperature is just right. He closes his eyes, and savours the moment of rest, and smiles at Niall, who is still standing on the other side of his desk.

“So you and Louis, huh?” Niall gets right to it. There’s no sense in hiding from him. Niall knows everyone’s business.

“Just sex.” Harry keeps it short.

“Just...sex?” Niall stretches out the sex, and Harry glares at him. It works on 99% of the people around him. Not on Niall though. He just shakes his head.

“Alright, just _sex_ then. Good to know.”  Niall bows his head as a way of goodbye, and slips out, leaving Harry to his meal. Harry shakes his head, although no one can see him. He grabs his phone, and types out a quick text.

**You didn’t have to.**

He gets a reply almost immediately.

**Wanted to.**

 

**

 

“Let’s play a game.” Louis’ eyes light up as he is kneeling between Harry’s legs, three fingers sliding in and out of him easily. It’s easy because Louis has been doing it for over ten minutes, nowhere near Harry’s prostate or cock. Harry is lying on his back in the middle of the bed, completely naked, with a sheen of sweat layering his entire body. Harry just moans at Louis’ suggestion until Louis pulls out of him all at once leaving him gaping, whining and alone. Harry starts to beg, a string of _Lou Lou Lou, please please please_ running from his mouth.

“So you want to play my game then?” Louis asks, barely touching Harry’s rim, just enough for Harry to remember that he still there, ghosting. Harry nods enthusiastically, eyes clenched shut, body searching anywhere for friction for both his aching cock, and his open hole. “Good. The rules are quite simple. If you want something, you have to tell me. In a full sentence.” Harry whimpers, and Louis knows how much Harry hates to talk when he is like this.

“So what do you want Harry?” Harry clenches his fists, and Louis knows that he is struggling, but he waits patiently.

“I want… Fuck, to come.” Harry breathes out, eyes still firmly shut. A tint of embarrassment on his cheeks.

“And how do you want to come?” Louis asks, voice as calm as he can manage given how turned on he is. Harry huffs in frustration. “Look at me, H.” Harry opens his eyes. They are red, and his nostrils are flaring. “Tell me how you want to come.”

“Fuck me, please please, fuck me.” Harry begs. He’s not the most talkative most of the time, but God, it sounds so beautiful to hear him beg. Louis lazily slips a finger in him, sliding in and out, in no particular patterns to reward him, not enough. Louis knows.

“Say, I want you to fuck me, sir.” Louis tells him, and a tear slips from Harry’s cheek. Louis didn’t mean to make Harry cry. But Fuck it’s just so hot to affect someone like. When Harry doesn’t speak for a moment he leans into Harry’s face, and whispers. “You know that we can stop if you want, right?” It’s in his normal, non threatening voice. Harry looks at him in the eye this time, and nods, almost a hint of a smile on his face, a lot of appreciation mostly. “Alright then, say it Harry, or you will be left lying here hard, and untouched.” For effect, he starts to stroke himself lazily, emphasizing who calls the shots, who gets to touch and who doesn’t.

“I want you to fuck me, sir.” The last word is almost choked out, and Louis smiles, as he puts on the nearby condom, and lubes himself up. He enters Harry in one push Harry sighs through, almost sounding relieved. Louis can’t help but chuckle.

“Don’t sound so happy yet H, I am nowhere near done with you.”

 

**

 

Louis steps into the office of his internship supervisor. He applied for a permanent position for when his internship is up, and he has officially graduated. He didn’t expect to get word on that so soon, and he is hoping that it isn’t something else that caused his boss to want to see him. He puts on a confident smile when he greets his boss.

“Louis, come in.” The booming voice calls to him. He sits on the other side of the desk, trying to keep his hands still.

“Good to see you Mr. Sheeran.”

“Please, call me Ed.” Louis tries not to react. He has never asked Louis to call him Ed before. He is a friendly man, but tends to keep his relationships in the office quite professional. “You applied for a permanent position here.” Ed states as a fact. Louis nods. “That’s not for another three months, is that right?”

“Yes sir. End of May, when I graduate.” Louis affirms, growing increasingly anxious with every sentence. Ed is looking over a few pieces of loose paper in front of him, studying them more like.

Finally he looks at Louis. “I got a call from Mr. Styles of Styles&Styles giving me a personal, and very positive recommendation. Do you know Mr. Styles?”

Louis is begging for his cheeks not to flush, or the manner in which Louis knows _Mr. Styles_ to not show on his face. He nods again. “I work for his company, part time.”

“Yes, he said.” Ed smirks to himself. “I know Harry, we travel in the same social groups. Well, there is normally more work than socializing, but I do know him, and I must say, I was surprised to get a call from him on behalf of one of his employees. I was even more surprised to get an earful about not paying my interns.” Ed is straight up laughing now. Louis isn’t in on the joke, so he smiles quietly. “But Harry just doesn’t do this sort of thing. If he has an employee he likes as much as he seems to like you, he does what he can to keep them. He basically ordered me to hire you. He sometimes forgets who’s in charge.”

Louis almost chokes at this sentence. He is silently praying that his boss gets to the point of this meeting before Louis just bares his soul, or at the rate that Ed is going, just asks him outright if he is sleeping with him. “Is there...something that I can help you with?” Louis asks, trying to get to the point.

“Ah! Yes!” Ed says, as though he almost forgot why they were having this chat. “I fully intended to hire you with or without Harry’s intervention. You are an excellent addition to our team, and given the letters of recommendation from your superiors, and your professors, I just wanted to let you know that you have a place here at the end of May.”

“Thank you sir!” Louis jumps up, and shakes his hand. Ed laughs again, reveling in the joy that Louis is producing.

“And about the paid internship…” Ed looks like he’s about to spoil the celebration.

“It’s fine Mr. Sheeran. I have a great job.” He smiles bright. Ed relaxes his shoulders.

“Ed, please. And I will definitely bring the idea to the board for the next semester interns.” Louis just nods, happy, and Ed shoos him away. “Go! Do your thing, make your magic!” He sits back down, looking through the large stack of paperwork on his desk, but he’s smiling. Louis all but runs from the office, and out the building. No one will fault him an early lunch, just for today.

 

**

 

Louis wastes no time when he gets through the lobby of Styles&Styles to go to the mail room. He doesn’t knock before he opens the door to Niall’s office, and sits on the chair opposite Niall himself, who doesn’t even lift his eyes from his computer screen, a set of reading glasses perches almost on the very end of his nose.

“What can I do for you today, Lewis?” Niall asks, his tone dry, but humorous at the same time.

“Why did you tell Harry to give me a letter of recommendation?” He asks, mostly out of breath from sprinting most of the way from the subway station.

Niall looks up at this, peering over the glasses. “I didn’t ask _Harry_ to give you a recommendation.” The emphasis on the name Harry makes Louis realise that he screwed up. He has the dignity to look chastened, but not enough to apologise.

“Well, why did he then?” Louis demands, feeling more anxious about this conversation than the one with Ed. Niall just leans back in his chair, forehead creased in concentration.

“Well, he did call down last week and ask where you were interning, and who your boss was. It’s not in your employee record, but I knew, and didn’t think you would care if he did as well.” Niall just shrugs at this. “So he gave you a recommendation? That’s great! Harry never does that.”

This is the second time someone has been surprised that Harry is trying to get rid of an employee. It makes Louis think. “Yeah, that’s what Mr. Sheeran said.” But he’s frowning, he can’t help it. Something isn’t sitting well with him. “Why is he so happy to be rid of me then?”

Niall just rolls his eyes, completely void of sympathy. “Would you really want to get a permanent position here? In a mailroom, or even as a juniour executive at a fashion company?”

“Well, no. But how would he know that?” Louis crosses his arms, feeling defensive.

“I don’t know, maybe because he was down here months ago, and tried to get you promoted when I told him that you have a future ahead of you that isn’t in the fashion industry?” And while Niall’s sarcasm isn’t fully appreciated, the words are.

“He did? Months ago?”

“Yeah, only a few days after that first time you met him. You left quite an impression on him it seems. But he wouldn’t stand in the way of your dream, what you really want for yourself.”

Niall’s words silence Louis for a moment. Until Niall pipes up again. “If I may be so bold…” Louis raises an eyebrow at him, but Niall is never timid to begin with. He nods his head for Niall to go on. “He asked about your internship after you sent him the lunch.” Niall looks at Louis expectantly. Louis just stares back.

“And?”

Niall rolls his eyes. “maybe he just needs a little push. Maybe you shouldn’t let him call all the shots on this.” Niall says. It wouldn’t be a sentence that made sense to anyone else. But Louis has been doing this merry go round with Harry for a few months now, and while he is so happy with the way things are, he wonders if it will ever be more.

To Niall, he just nods his head. “Maybe.” Niall nods too, and smiles.

“By the way, I sent in a letter of recommendation too, no love for me?” Louis smiles bright at this.

“Thanks, I got the job! End of May, I guess I should give my letter of resignation.” Niall gets up, and Louis stands too. He puts his hand out, but Niall walks right past it to give him a tight hug.

“Good job kid. Now go and celebrate.”

“I have to go back to work actually.” Louis replies, not being able to wipe the smile off his face.

“Well, at least get a celebratory croissant.” Niall says as Louis is on his way out the door.

 

**

It’s still dark when Harry walks into his office on a dreary Thursday morning. The days are getting longer as winter makes it’s way out, but this is a particularly early morning, even for him. The halls were all but bare, and there is almost no lights on in the offices that he passed. But the light is on in his office, and when he stops in the doorway he can see the cause.

Louis is sitting at Harry’s desk. He is spinning in the large leather chair, legs tucked up slightly to keep his feet from hitting the floor. He didn’t hear Harry come in, too wrapped up in his own fun. It’s in times like these Harry remembers how young Louis is, how much joy he can get in something so simple and mundane.

Suddenly, he’s spotted, and Louis gets just a moment of surprise before he slows down his movements, and leans back in the chair. He smirks lazily at Harry. “You’re late.”

“Excuse me?” Harry asks, more amused than confused. Louis puts his feet up on the desk which looks a little ridiculous because the desk is massive compared to Louis’ compact frame.

“You’re late for our very important meeting.” Louis says, his face stern.

“Is that so.” Harry responds, trying to keep his face stern as well, he knows that he is failing miserably. He leans up against the door frame, crossing one leg over the other, enjoying the show in front of him.

“Yes, I just had a meeting with the head of HR. There have been some complaints. About some inappropriate behaviour.” Louis accents the words, and raise his eyebrows in emphasis. Harry just snorts.

“You would be the expert on inappropriate behaviour in the workplace.”

“I wouldn’t be so glib with your boss Mr. Styles.” Louis then picks something up off the desk that Harry hadn’t yet noticed. “You’re career is in my hands.”

“Is that….?” Harry stutters, the last word failing to come out of his mouth. Louis twists the paddle in his hands, inspecting it carefully.

“Maybe so. Now, about that bad behaviour…” Louis suddenly smacks the paddle against his hand, and Harry’s knees almost betray him on the spot.

“Yes Mr. Tomlinson, I am so sorry for my bad behaviour.” Louis smiles now that he finally has Harry’s attention.

“I don’t think an apology is going to cut it this time Mr. Styles. I have given you more chances than I think you deserve already.” Louis puts the paddle down on the desk again, in plain view. Harry can only stare. He wants it so much he’s practically salivating . “Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

“Please, sir.” The teasing has all but left Harry’s voice. The scenario may not be real, but the begging certainly is. “I will do anything to keep my job.”

Louis’ eyes are dark, and calculating, like a predator sizing up his prey. “Why don’t you come over here and show me how bad you want this job?”

Louis pushes his seat away from the desk, but doesn’t get up. Harry rushes over, and kneels between his legs. He only looks up at Louis once to see his look of approval before he pulls Louis’ pants and underwear down to get access to his already hard cock. Louis is wearing loose fitting sweats, and they go easily. Harry immediately sinks down, and starts eagerly bobbing on Louis. He makes it seem like he’s sucking dick to save his life, and he thinks it’s working. When he looks up to Louis, his face is scrunched tight, his knuckles white against the armrest of the chair. Louis sits still and silent while Harry takes care of him.

After a few minutes Harry can hear him tsk tsk. He looks up again, and although Louis looks fucked out, he is shaking his head. “Is that the best you can do?” Louis asks, trying to sound disappointed although he sounds more like he’s about to come any second. Harry pulls off, and pouts. “I don’t think you were trying at all. This is not the good behaviour that I was looking for from an employee.” He lifts Harry to his feet by the arm, it’s gentle but firm, and Harry moves easily. Louis stands as well, and when they are face to face, Louis leans in close, mouth barely touching Harry’s ear. “I am going to have to punish you.”

Harry is sure that he whites out for a moment, but Louis takes no extra time spinning him around, and bending him over the desk. “I could do this over your trousers.” Louis says as Harry is kneeling in front of him. “But the way you have been acting, I think that you would learn more if I spanked you bare.” Harry is already hard, and Louis speaking to him the way he is could easily send him over the edge. He really doesn’t want that though, so he concentrates on not coming while Louis undoes his pants from behind, and pulls them down to his knees. “Now Mr. Styles. I like my desk very neat and tidy, so I don’t want any piece of paper out of place, so you have to stay very still. Do you understand?” Louis finishes his speech by rubbing his hand gently over the curve of Harry’s ass. Harry nods his head, but Louis doesn’t respond to him.

“Yes sir.” He speaks. It’s a mechanical tone as he is trying to focus on keeping his body from losing control, but it proves enough for Louis.

“Good, I am going to give you ten spanks. That should teach you a well enough lesson, don’t you think?”

“Yes sir.”  

“Good.” Louis takes no time to bring the paddle down on Harry’s left cheek. It’s not that hard, but still brings a bloom of sharp pain through his lower half. “And that was?” Louis asks. Harry knows exactly what he wants.

“One.” Harry responds, strained already, cock steadily dripping from arousal. Louis gives him another on his right cheek. “Two” Harry immediately says, not waiting for a prompt this time.

“Very good. You want to be good for me, don’t you?” He doesn’t wait for the answer before he brings the paddle down again, a little harder, but nowhere near as hard as Harry can take it. Harry counts out every one, and by the time they get to ten he can hear Louis’ heavy breathing over his own. Louis lays a hand on Harry’s lower back, keeping him still, and rubs it down to Harry’s hot bottom. He squeezes the softest part of the flesh hard, and Harry can only whimper. Louis brings his hand around Harry’s waist, and grinds up against him, fully hard, and dripping pre come onto the cleft of his ass. “Now tell me Mr. Styles.” Louis says, out of breath, and practically groaning between his words. “What is your job here?”

Harry lowers his head between his shoulders, resting it for a moment on the cool desk. He takes a couple of deep breaths before he lifts it again, twisting a little to try to look at Louis behind him. “To serve you, sir.” Louis does groan at this, and he wastes no time lubing himself up, and pushing slowly, but steadily into Harry’s hole. He’s not prepped enough, but he wants it, he wants the burn, the reminder of who he belongs to. He grips the desk’s edge to steady himself, and lets Louis take him the way he wants. Louis doesn’t hold back, his thrusts growing erratic almost immediately. But he doesn’t touch Harry until almost the very end.

“Come.” He commands, and Harry can’t help it, he does. Spurting on the front of his desk. Louis rides him through it, snapping his hips, pushing Harry forward, driving him into the edge of the solid wood. He only holds off for a moment or two though before he’s coming as well. He swears loudly, and grips the sensitive, paddled skin, and Harry wants to cry out, but he can’t. He’s floating off of his high, he feels nothing but warm and fuzzy.

He vaguely feels Louis pulling his pants back up, and lowering him into his office chair. He can vaguely feel Louis kissing his mouth. He can hear Louis getting himself dressed.

“Harry, I have to go.” He hears, and he is having a hard time comprehending.

“Where?” He manages to ask, trying to keep his eyes opened even though all his body wants is sleep.

“Work, I don’t have much time. I just wanted to say thank you. For calling Mr. Sheeran, and for wanting me to do great in music. Thank you Harry.” Louis is kissing him again, and Harry is chasing his mouth, looking for the physical contact, for the confirmation that Louis is there. But it’s gone too soon. Harry feels very alone, and vulnerable sitting, almost curled up on the chair.

“You’re going to call me?” Louis asks, and Harry is confused.e doesn’t like how he’s feeling. He doesn’t know what is wrong with him. “Harry?” Louis asks again, he’s barely out the door. Harry just nods, staring blankly at the wall beside Louis’ head. Louis pauses for another second, a crease in his eyebrow, but he looks at his watch, and without another word, he leaves.

The door closes behind him, and Harry's alone.

 

**

 

Louis isn’t fully worried yet. He hasn’t heard from Harry since the morning he surprised him in his office. The first couple of days, he just waited for Harry to call, like he usually does. The third day he texted him a quick _what’s up?_ But he hasn’t heard a thing. He’s telling himself not to worry. It’s not the longest he has gone without hearing from him. It’s just that that morning, what they did, it was kind of a lot. And Louis is now starting to think that he crossed some kind of line. At the very least he would like the chance to apologise if that’s the case.

Louis thinks he’ll wait at least another two days before asking Niall if Harry is alright. Maybe he’s on a business trip. CEOs do that. Right? Maybe he’s sick. Or maybe Louis freaked him out so much that Harry wants nothing else to do with him.

He’s forming his speech in his head while mindlessly sorting through the letters in his hand when the door opens behind him. He jumps from the noise, and turns. He’s both surprised  and not at all surprised to see Harry standing in the doorway. They both freeze for a moment, eyeing each other but Harry has a determined look on his face. He walks into the room unprompted. He goes to his usual spot, the table in the corner, but he hesitates, looking at Louis. Not for permission, not for reassurance, he  just...stares. Finally he just sits, folding his legs in front of him. Louis goes to him immediately, and as soon as Louis is close enough, close enough to touch, Harry just crumples in front of him. He sinks his head into his hands, and a choked, wet sound comes from his mouth.

Louis doesn’t know what to do. He stands frozen in front of the table, itching to reach out, but feeling like he shouldn’t. Finally Harry’s sobs subside a little. He runs his hands rough over his face, and through his hair that’s falling limp over his eyes. Louis clears his throat, but Harry makes no move to acknowledge him.

“Harry?” He says gently. Harry squeezes his eyes shut, almost like the sound of Louis’ voice causes him pain. He hesitates again, but Louis doesn’t have to speak again because Harry does instead.

It starts with just an opening, and closing of his mouth, and then a sigh, and a slump of his shoulders. “I can’t…” His chin crumples a little, but he clears his throat and tries to look Louis in the eye. It’s not a look or expression that Louis has ever seen before. “I need to get this out, sorry.” He practically whispers, and Louis nods, sympathetic. He still doesn’t try to touch, tries to be as quiet as possible. “Have you ever heard of BDSM?” Harry asks him, almost cringing at his own words. Louis nods, but it’s obvious to both of them that he probably knows about it as much as any person who has ever browsed through a porn site. “BDSM Bondage and Discipline, Domination, and Submission, Sadism, and Masochism.” He looks at Louis for confirmation that he hears him. Louis nods again, feeling a little confused.

“I am submissive. I am sure you have noticed.” Harry plays with the hem of his pant legs, avoiding eye contact. “Not with everyone, just you… and with dominants. I told myself that I wouldn’t get involved with someone who wasn’t into the BDSM lifestyle. I can’t be with someone who can’t give that to me, who I can't submit to. I told myself when I met you….” He cuts himself off again. Louis instinctively puts his hand forward to touch, to comfort, but Harry shies away from it. It breaks something inside Louis, and he feels like he is on the verge of breaking down right beside Harry.

“It started out feeling so good.” Harry says with an anguish that pierces Louis’ ears. “I told myself that we were not going too far. I was so stupid. It was my fault.” He looks at Louis again, and again Louis nods, although he can’t imagine what Harry thinks that he might have done. “We weren’t being safe, and I knew that. I let myself go into subspace, I never checked myself. I let myself drop. I did it. Not you, okay?” Harry is pleading with him. Louis is more confused now than when Harry walked in.

“Harry, love, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The fear in Louis’ voice comes out clear as day. He’s on the verge of pleading as well, for answers, for Harry to come back to him. Because this isn’t him, and he doesn’t know what happened.

“No, you don’t. That is a big part of the problem. I didn’t mean to drag you into this. I just thought, maybe if I just let you do what you wanted, just didn’t ask, that meant that I wasn’t pushing you into anything, but we went too far. We weren’t safe.” Harry repeats what he said before.

“Please, just tell me what happened. I don’t understand.” Louis is now running his hands through his hair, fear building to the point that he wants to shake the answers out of Harry.

“In the office. I went into subspace. It’s… hard to explain. It’s like floating, it’s a happy place, and it feels so good. But with that comes the risk of dropping, and I dropped. And I am still dropping.” Harry sinks in on himself, wrapping his arms around his middle like he’s trying to hold himself together. “ I did this, but I can’t let myself do it again. God, it hurts too much. I am sorry.” Harry gets up. Louis is tempted to make him stay, just order him to stay still, and not leave. That’s what he wants to do, but he can’t he knows he isn’t allowed.

“What about us?” Louis asks, his voice sounds small. He feels small. He feels like he’s playing a game he doesn’t know the rules of.

“I’m sorry, Louis. I didn’t mean for this to happen. Just-- Good luck with your new job.”

For a moment Louis thinks that Harry is going to lean in and kiss him, like he has done countless times before leaving the mail room, but he just stares, like he’s trying to remember something, or like he’s trying to forget. Eventually he just turns and walks away, leaving Louis feeling cold and empty.

He doesn’t know how long he stands in the spot where he watched Harry walk out the door. His shoulders slumped, and breath stilted, but eventually he makes his way out the door, and into the brightening day. It’s one of those weird days where he doesn’t have to go to his internship, or classes, so after his shift in the mail room, he has nowhere to be but home. Except his body is filled with this thrum of energy, like a rush of adrenaline he has no way to spend, and so he starts walking.

He can’t even say that he remembers the entire conversation he had with Harry. If he could even call it that. He spent a lot of time stunned that Harry was breaking down in front of him, until  the dreadful realization that he was walking away from Louis for good hit him. A few key points definitely stuck out, and kept repeating on loop in his head. _BDSM, submissive, subspace_ , and finally _sub drop_ . He doesn’t know what any of this means, not really. But apparently they were doing it. And most frighteningly, _it hurt Harry._

He isn’t really surprised he ends up at Sonic’s coffee stand. it's only 7:30 am, so there’s a morning rush line . He hangs back. coffee isn’t really what he’s here for anyway. He hangs close to the corner of the stand, watching  people without being too obvious. Some linger at the counter, and whisper their secrets into Sonic’s waiting ear. Some just take their order and rush off, barely sparing the man behind the counter a glance. He smiles regardless, not bothered by the sense of urgency that this city on a cool Thursday morning brings.

Finally the crowd dies down, and Louis slowly makes his way to the front of the counter. Sonic smiles at him. Louis doesn’t pretend that he wasn’t spotted as soon as he came in view. Sonic lifts a cup in question, and Louis just nods before it’s being filled with hot liquid. Louis doesn’t even care what it is. He takes a tentative sip when it’s placed in front of him. Coffee, black. Strangely soothing. He takes a breath, and sighs it out before he looks at Sonic’s patient face.

“Okay, I know that you are all about the listening, and letting other people do the talking, but I need help.” Louis rushes it out. He’s met with a concerned stare, and decides to just come out with it. “The guy I am seeing… was seeing. He told me some things today. And then he just broke it off, and I am still so confused, but most importantly, I think I hurt him.” He’s met with a dark stare. “Not physically, at least I don’t think. He… he was crying, and said something about dropping, and hurting, and then he left. I don’t know what to do. Fuck.” He’s met with a creased brow, and a frown, but nothing else. Louis looks at him with increasing desperation for what feels like minutes, before his shoulders -and hopes- sink. He walks away, leaving  the coffee behind him.

“Wait.” A quiet voice says behind him, jolting him to an abrupt stop. He turns around, and there is Sonic walking toward him. He’s shrugging on a black coat, and already bracing himself against the chill.

“Um… you just talked to me. You can talk.” Louis accuses him. He’s met with a familiar eye roll.

“I want to help.” The man says. He has a thick British accent, and he barely speaks above a whisper, but he starts walking towards the coffee stand again, and Louis follows. He grabs a napkin, and starts writing things down. The writing is rushed, and messy, but when he hands it to Louis, it is a list of websites. A few of the words make Louis understand what they are about.

“Do you...you know about this? The submissive stuff?” Louis asks, almost pleading for someone to make him understand. He just gets a shoulder shrug.

“I listen to people. I think this can help you.”

Louis looks down at the paper again. He sticks it in his pocket. When he looks up, Sonic is holding the still hot cup towards him. “Thank you.” Louis says, and it’s genuine. He digs in his pocket to pay for the drink, but Sonic just shakes his head.

“On the house this time.” They smile at each other, and Louis watches Sonic walk behind the booth again, and take his usual place. He shucks off the coat, and warms his hands on one of the heaters, resuming the peaceful smile that Louis knows him for.

Before he leaves, Louis can’t resist asking though. “You’re name isn’t really Sonic though, right?”

Sonic gives him a smirk, and a hint of a wink. “Don’t push it.”

 

**

 

Louis does go home after that. His apartment is blissfully empty, being that it is the early morning, and his housemates are all out to work or school. He shrugs off his coat, and pulls out the slightly crumpled napkin. He sits at the kitchen table and stares at it. He doesn't know what he is scared of apart from knowing that once he knows, once he understands, he will never be able to unknow, and things won't be the same. But things won't ever be the same anyway because Harry walked away, and Louis has no idea why, so this is his ticket.

So he types in the first link.

The first one is largely dedicated to finding other people in the bdsm lifestyle, or on the scene. Louis isn’t really interested in that, but does take down some addresses for places where he might get some more information. The next one had a list of glossary words. This is more where Louis was hoping to start.

He wants to jump straight to the words that Harry had used, the ones that stuck out, but he makes himself read everything that the can on the page. He goes to BDSM first -it’s just as Harry had said- butt also tells him that a person who might like one or more of these things might not necessarily be into some of the others, and those preferences would need to be discussed in detail with your partner. He thinks back to any discussion that  he may have had with Harry about what they did. He knew it wasn’t just the sex, but it was fun, and it made him feel good. He didn’t realise what kind of an impact it could have on Harry, or him for that matter. Hell he didn’t even realise it could have an impact at all.

He passes through some other terms of reference. Some making him cringe, some making him want to know more. He soon gets out a pad of paper, and starts writing things down, so that he can learn more. Finally after a long list, and a lot of skimming he comes to the words he was looking for.

Submissive- An individual who consents to give up power to a Dominant. This can be any duration - for an hour, or a lifetime.

It makes sense. No big surprises there. Harry mentioned dominants. He said he only submitted to dominants… and Louis. Does Harry not see him as a dominant? Is Louis a dominant? Does he want to be?

He keeps reading. The explanation behind the term subspace is short, and doesn’t tell Louis what he wants. There is no entry for sub drop. He clicks out of that website, and decides to turn to good old Google instead.

When he finally finds what he’s looking for, he is a mix of scared, aroused, and hungry for what is described. He wants to make Harry feel safe enough to lose control, to give up everything to Louis. As he continues to read someone’s personal experience as a Dominant putting their submissive into subspace he can only picture what that would be like, how that would feel, how it would look. He has never felt a greater pull to anything than he does in this moment.

There are so many things that a Dominant needs to do to keep their submissive safe, and Louis can only remember Harry’s words then. _We weren’t safe_ . Louis didn’t take care of Harry well enough. And it hurt. Harry said that it wasn’t his fault, but he did that. It was Louis who should have been making sure that Harry was feeling good, and taken care of.

He tentatively clicks on the link for sub drop, and every word there makes his heart sink. Tears, fear, need to be comforted, depression. Harry said he was still dropping. Which means that he is still dealing with all of these and feelings. Fuck!

“Not your fault” -Harry’s words, keep echoing in his head, like a cruel song. He did all of this. And worse, if he decides that this lifestyle… this scene.. .is something he wants to pursue, he could do it again.

He is sitting in the middle of his bed, laptop opened to the article about sup drop on one side of him, and a list of kinks, and scenes that interested him, on the other. He sits for a long time looking between the two, remembering Harry under him, in front of him. The look, the feel of him. The way that he made Louis feel. In this moment, he doesn’t really feel like he has a choice. He clicks out of the article, and opens a new window. He spends the entire afternoon reading every article and blog he can that will tell him how to never let that happen again.

 

**

 

He feels a little hungover from the overload of information the next morning. He stayed up for hours, even signing into a few forums, and chat groups. But the most important thing he is worried about when he comes to work the next morning is Harry. He is going to respect Harry’s need for space for the time being, until he feels like he is prepared to have a conversation with him, but he can’t just go about his day knowing that Harry is hurting. Not for any reason, and especially not because of something Louis did. He mindlessly gets through his shift in the mailroom, counting the minutes until Niall makes his way into the office for the day.

“Hey there.” Niall greets him with a surprised smile. “Didn’t expect to see you here this morning.”

“I needed to talk to you about something, a favour more like.” Louis replies. He feels uncomfortable even talking to Niall about this, but he doesn’t think like he has any other choice. Niall just raises his eyebrows, and smiles that amused smile of his.

“This should be good.” He replies.

“I need you to keep an eye on Harry.” Niall’s face turns more serious. It’s not the first time that Louis has noticed Niall’s fierce loyalty to Harry, which is exactly why Louis is coming to him about this.

“Not spy on him, or anything like that. I just need someone to be paying attention to him, making sure that he knows someone cares. Just making sure that he’s okay.” Niall doesn’t change his expression, but he leans back in his chair a little.

“And there is a reason why you cannot do this yourself?” Niall plays his cards close to his hand, but Louis can tell that he is thrown off by all of this. Louis knows the feeling.

“Yes, and I swear to God I am trying to make it right, but right now, I need to know that someone else, someone that cares will be there until I can.”

Niall is downright stormy at this point, but he nods. “You know, I have never been wrong about someone.”

Louis smiles at this. “You aren’t wrong this time either. I promise.” Niall smiles a little, finally, and waves him out the door. Louis breathes a huge sigh of relief, and rushes home to change for school.

 

**

 

He is on day three of his research binge when he is ready to pull his hair out. He’s on a BDSM forum, and most of his questions are being either dismissed, or down right mocked. Why in the hell do people become such assholes when they get behind a computer screen? He types out a post in response.

**I find it funny that a group that will spend hours discussing the benefits of certain knots in rope, or their favourite paddles won’t take five minutes to tell me how not to let my partner subdrop.**

He’s met by more condescending replies to this. Including people telling him that it is literally impossible to tell someone how to do that along with a list of things that they would need to know about him, his partner, and what their prefered play is in order to even approach the subject. And that is the most frustrating thing of all. Louis doesn’t know. Some of the more rude posters tell him to just get lost, and find a new hobby. Some think he’s trolling. Louis starts to wonder if maybe they are telling the truth. Maybe he just needs to give up.

He is about to close his laptop for the night when he sees a private message pop up. He clicks on it immediately, mostly expecting a fight. It’s a poster that he has never even seen.

 **lips &lace-**  I am replying to you on the off chance that you are serious about all of your questions, and not just a troll, or a kid with nothing better to do. Most of the posters that answered you, are right. There is no magic formula for subspace, or subdrop. You can’t just wander into a chat group and start demanding answers. A lot of these people have never even experienced subspace in person. Most people are looking to enhance their partner’s pleasure, not just stopping the bad, and this is the part that intrigues me.

 **LoTo95-** I know, realistically I know. But I am serious in trying to find my answers. I am new, like, really new to this, and I already messed up. I can’t let that happen again. Please, I need help. I have no one I can talk to about this.

 **lips &lace-** You’re going about it all wrong. It is great that you care about your partner and his needs so much, but the truth is, if you are attentive enough, caring enough, and worry as much as you seem to be doing right now, there is little chance of this happening to you.

 **LoTo95-** It’s already happened. My partner went into subdrop, and I didn’t even know that BDSM really existed until it was too late.

 **lips &lace-** Ok, now you are just bullshitting me.

 **LoTo95-**  I am not, I swear I am not. He was in the scene before. He knew. I didn’t. I can’t let it happen again.

 **lips &lace-** Did you not talk about it before you played?

 **LoTo95-** No, never. It isn’t really like that, between us.

 **lips &lace-** Well, there you have it. That is your #1, and biggest, most important rule. Communication.

 **LoTo95-** That’s it? Now who’s bullshitting?

 **lips &lace-** he would never have subdropped, or for that matter he would never have gone into subspace without your knowledge if you two had communicated before, during, and after. Don’t play unless you are 100% confident that you are comfortable with what you are doing, and that your partner is as well. And I mean, no doubts. Safewords, and aftercare. It all comes down to communication. Giving him what he needs, and making sure that you get what you need. That should be true for all sex, but especially for this kind of sex.

 **LoTo95-** Yeah, I guess that makes sense.

 **lips &lace-** Can I ask you something, are you doing this for him, or are you doing it for you? Because if you are just in the scene because you like a person who is in the scene, it’s not going to work, and you can end up hurting yourself as much as you are scared of hurting this guy.

 **LoTo95-** It was just for him, I mean, at first. But now that I know more, and see more. It’s definitely for me as well.

 **lips &lace-** Good, so my advice now is to find out what you want. What you like, what turns you on. That is what is important for the first step. You did it a little backwards, but there is still time to turn it around. I know doms like to think that they are out there to please the sub masses sometimes (hehe) but you have to do what makes you feel good too. And if you are lucky, you find someone who feels the same.

 **LoTo95-** So worry about me, then him? That feels unnatural.

 **lips &lace-** See? Natural dom. ;)  Good luck. I think you are going to be okay. And ignore the pricks in here, stick around. I think this place might be good for you once you start to feel more comfortable.

 **LoTo95-** Well, I will let you know if nothing else.

Louis logs out of the forum, out of the educational blogs, and clicks on the first sex site on Sonic’s list. He doesn’t even think before he goes straight to BDSM, and just clicks the first video he finds. It’s pretty tame. A man laying on a table, face down while another man fingers him open. Nothing he hasn’t seen, or done before. It seems that the most that they are getting form this is role play, which Louis is definitely down for. The next one is definitely different. The Dom keeps telling, ordering his sub to do increasingly more difficult tasks, such as deep throating, and getting into seemingly painful positions. Every time the sub accomplishes a task, the dom praises him, tells him how wonderful he is, how beautiful. The sub gets off on pleasing the dom, and the reward is the praise. He starts to picture Harry in this position, and the thought causes blood to rush down. By the time he gets to the fourth or fifth video he is actively stroking himself, and every sub starts to look like Harry under his domination. The video that finishes him off is a beautiful sub. Slim waist, but wide shoulders, lean muscles, and piercing eyes that are red rimmed as he is being taken over the knee by his dom who keeps telling him how well he is taking his punishment. The sub’s ass is a spectacular shade of red, and his dick looks painfully hard. There is a plug sticking out of his crack, and the sound the sub makes when the dom makes contact with it goes directly to Louis’ dick, ripping an orgasm straight from his belly. He comes unexpectedly, and without warning when the sub on the screen starts yelling please over and over again.

Louis almost feels disappointed that his little session is over, but he can’t help but smile. He feels like he found something that he didn’t even know he was looking for. He feels like he finally has some sort of control over the situation.

 

**

 

Bright and early Monday morning Louis is in the mail room. He’s bittersweet about the idea of not being here anymore. He still has a couple of months left, but those months will fly by, he knows it. He has a few moments to himself before he has to go to his other job for the day when Niall walks in.

“Good morning.” Niall boasts cheerfully. He pats Louis on the back.

“Good morning Niall!” Louis replies. “I am just finishing up here.”

“Anywhere you need to be?” Niall asks, feigning innocence-- Niall knows Louis’ schedule almost better than Louis himself.

“Internship in two hours.” Louis replies. He leaves out the _You know this_ at the end.

“He’s okay you know.” Niall says, giving Louis a hard stare. Louis nods, relieved.

“That’s good, thank you Niall.”

“He knows what he’s doing. He knows who he is.” Niall continues on, as though Louis hadn’t said anything.

“I’m glad.” Louis says.

“Are you still working on making me not wrong?”

Louis chuckles at this. “I think I have it mostly worked out.”

“Then why haven't you done anything about it yet?”

Louis has no idea. He knows in his head, and his heart what he wants now, but he’s been carrying it around, close to his heart like a locked diary, for his eyes only for days.

Niall puts his hand on Louis’ shoulder. “No time like the present.” It’s not a request. Niall literally pushes him out the door. “He’s in his office.”

 

**

 

He takes the elevator to the top floor. When the door open he’s faced with a smiling Liam. “Good morning!” Liam greets him, much like Niall had minutes earlier.

“Hi Liam. Is Harry busy?” Liam does a quick check of his computer.

“He’s got a conference call in ten minutes.” Liam smiles apologetically.

“This will only take five, if that.” Louis says, he can’t keep the dread from his voice.

Liam shrugs his shoulders. He places a call. “Mr. Tomlinson is here to see you. He said it will only take a moment.” There’s a pause, and Liam looks at Louis like he’s getting an earful from Harry. He looks a mixture of scared, and apologetic. But when he gets off the phone, he motions for Louis to go ahead.

When Louis walks in the door Harry is rising to his feet. He’s filled with a nervous energy that Louis can almost see vibrating off of him, much the same as when they first met. He knows why now. Harry doesn’t say anything, just stands, rigid, and eyes hard. Not angry, just closed off.

“Harry, I know you don’t want to see me, but I’d like to talk to you.” Harry doesn’t move, barely blinks. Louis can see the whites on his knuckles from clenching his fists. “Tonight, 8pm. I will come to your house. If you don’t want to hear what I have to say, don’t answer. I will wait until 8.05pm. I won’t try again.” Harry remains frozen in his spot. Louis wasn’t expecting a whole lot. But it still hurts to have Harry in front of him, and not get that reaction, that connection. After a moment of just looking at each other, watching more like, the phone rings. It jolts Harry from his state of shock, and his expression changes. CEO Harry clicks back in, and he only spares Louis one more glance before he reaches for the phone.

“Styles.” He says, his voice hard. Louis turns and walks back out the door without another sound.

 

**

 

He shows up at Harry’s building at 7.55 pm. He stares up at Harry’s window waiting for the right time. He has made peace with the fact that Harry might just not answer the door but that doesn’t make it hurt any less.

At 8 pm exactly, he rings the buzzer. He tries not to stare at his watch right away. A minute  later, he is still standing alone on the stoop - not that he’s counting or anything. The third minute passes, and still nothing. He’s talking himself into just going, not waiting the full five minutes -- a futile surge of pride. Every second is excruciatingly long. e said he would stay for five though, so that’s what he’s going to do.. When minute four ends, Louis starts counting down the seconds until he can run from this place, and flee to the comfort of his own bed to lick his wounds.

Suddenly the door unlocks. There is no warning, no asking who’s there over the intercom, just a click of the door. He’ll take it. When he reaches Harry’s floor and knocks, the door opens for him to reveal Harry. He doesn’t greet Louis, he turns his back  as soon as Louis steps inside. It’s frustrating, it hurts all at once. He takes his shoes off at the door and follows Harry to the kitchen where he finds him just standing, staring at the counter, a thumb in his mouth, biting on the nail.

“Harry?” Louis asks as gently as he can. It doesn’t stop Harry’s shoulders from tensing up. He sighs. “You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to. I just want to make sure you are alright. And... and I am really not prepared to walk away from you yet.”

This makes Harry shake his head automatically. “I told you, Louis.” He doesn’t turn around, just mumbles into the finger still caught between his teeth.

“You did tell me. And I am glad that you did. But you definitely didn't ask me.”

Finally Harry turns around and looks at Louis. His eyes are defensive, his stance as well. “I couldn't.” He practically pleads with Louis. “I can't.”

“Why not?” Louis returns. “You can ask me for anything Harry. I think you should know by now that I would do anything in my power to give it to you.”

Harry is still shaking his head, not allowing himself to hear Louis , let alone believe him. “No, it wasn't like that. It wasn't supposed to be.”

“It was supposed to be just sex right? Just a little fun? But something happened along the way.”

“That was my fault. I let it go too far.” Harry is still skirting around the subject.  But at least he's talking. Louis decides to take it up a notch. He has nothing to lose at this point.

“You know, the chances of a sub dropping is increased when he or she is in a committed relationship.”

Louis watches Harry's face alternate from shock to fear to embarrassment. “We weren’t in a relationship.” He replies. It stings more than it should. It’s only the truth. Harry runs his hands through his already disheveled hair.  “How do you know that?”

“I read it. I've read a lot of things over the past week or so.”

“Why? You didn't have to.”

“I kind of did.” Louis says, it’s soft, but his voice sounds tired. “Harry, I wish you would just talk to me. I need you to communicate with me. Please.” Harry looks like he is about to protest, or withdraw, but Louis puts his hand up in surrender. “Just tonight, and if you want, after tonight, I won’t try to bring it up again.”

Harry seems to consider it for a moment, and then points to a kitchen stool. Louis sits, and Harry does as well. He stares at his hands, folded tightly together on the table for a while, but Louis doesn’t say anything, he has waited this long, he can wait a little longer. “I was in a relationship a while ago. It was serious, and we were together for almost two years.” Harry doesn’t say this with a sense of sadness, or emotion, just a statement of fact. Louis nods, encouraging him to go on. “When I met him, I had already been on the scene for a few years. I had only ever subbed for someone who I had also been in a relationship with, and that is the only way I had ever felt comfortable. But then I met Andrew, and I accidentally fell in love with him before I found out that he wouldn’t...couldn’t be a part of that. He was naturally dominant, and that is what drew me to him, I think. Like you.” Harry spares a quick glance at Louis before he lowers his head again. “He loved to push me around in bed, not in a bad way, just he liked being in charge. But when I brought up BDSM, and dom/sub, he just said a firm no. I chose him over that lifestyle, and I didn’t regret it. But when we split up, I said that I wouldn’t do that to myself, or someone else again.”

“So when we met, you decided that I wasn’t a person who you wanted to get involved with.” Louis tries to not sound hurt, but it doesn’t quite happen.

“I knew that you weren’t on the scene. I could tell by the way you talked, and acted around me.”

“Why did you let me do the things I was doing then?”

“I needed it, so much, I can’t even describe to you how much I needed it.” Harry looks at Louis pleadingly. “It was just easy. You made it easy to pretend that it was real.”

“It was real to me Harry!” Louis doesn’t intend for the outburst to come out. Harry is still shaking his head. “Harry,” He says a little softer, “what do I have to do to show you that I want this too?”

“How could you want this? You’re not a dom, you’re not on the scene.”

Louis sighs, and forgets about personal boundaries. He stands up, and moves around behind Harry chair. He drapes himself across his back, and for the first time in days feels like he’s a whole person again. “Oh my God, Harry,” Louis says in exasperated fondness, “What do you think we have been doing for the last few months.”

Harry breaks at this, huffing out a dry sob. “I don’t know. I-- I’m so sorry.”

“There is nothing to be sorry about. I mean it, but can we please finally talk about it? I think it’s time.” Louis moves back in front of Harry so he can see his face. “Even if… even if you don’t want anything with me, I need some answers, and I think you are the only one who can provide them. Please.” Harry nods, and Louis sits back in his chair. The atmosphere seems to settle a little, the tension easing. Harry’s face is more open, and Louis tries to give him a small smile.

“Yeah, I am ready.” Harry returns the small smile with another of his own.

“Okay, first thing on the list I want to get out of the way-- What you did, what we did wasn’t safe, and I am really hurt, and upset that you let that happen, and that I let it happen. I hurt you, and you sitting in that mailroom crying because I hurt you is something that I will never forget.”

“God, I am so sorry Louis.” Harry says, and it is so genuine, and raw that it strikes right through Louis’ heart. He reaches out for one of Harry’s hands, and Harry gives it to him willingly.

“I don’t want you to be careless with yourself. I will never let that happen to you. But if you decide… if you are with someone else. I need you to promise me that you’ll be more careful. That you’ll be safe..” Harry hesitates, but nods once in understanding.  

“Alright.” Louis continues. “Second is that the weeks before that, were the most incredible of my life. Mostly because I got to spend them with you, but also because you opened up this whole new world to me. I’ve spent the last ten days searching, and researching, and finding other people who can help me through this, and I know that it is something I want to pursue. I want to be a dom. I don’t think that I could walk away from it now even if I tried.”

Louis can tell that Harry is trying to hide his shock, or is it disbelief? “You don’t have to say that.” He settles on eventually.

“And you don’t have to assume because you met one man that didn’t share your sexual preferences that we are all like that.” Louis says primly. Harry blushes slightly. Harry telling him about his last boyfriend just cemented that belief in stone.

“So with or without me, you are going to stay in the BDSM community?” Harry questions, again with a slight hint of doubt.

“Yes, which brings me to my third, and most important point.” Louis looks Harry in the eyes, wanting to will away all of the doubt, and sadness. “I don’t want to do anything without you. That starts with sex, and ends with waking up every morning. Somewhere along the line I fell head over heels for you. I tried to tell myself that it was just a sex thing, then just maybe friends with benefits. But I don’t want to be your friend.” Louis leans in, and touches Harry’s face with his free hand. The other still clasped tightly in Harry’s. “I want to be everything with you.”

Harry closes his eyes, and leans into the touch. Louis can see him swallow back the welling emotion. When he opens them again there is a new light behind them, the doubts starting to slowly fade. “Are you sure?”

“I have never been more sure of anything in my life. I love you.”

“God, I love you too.” Harry whispers before he moves forward, and practically falls into Louis’ lap, kissing him deeply. Louis wraps his arms around Harry’s back, and holds him tight. “I wanted it so much, I couldn’t let myself believe it would happen.” Harry mumbles into Louis’ mouth.

“I want you so much.” Louis mumbles back. “Never going to let you go.”

“Don’t want you to.” Harry responds, kissing Louis deeper, but Louis breaks it.

“You know that there is more.” Louis says, huffing for air. Harry moves his mouth down to Louis’ neck, and shoulder.

“Yes.” He says simply, slowing down his kisses, but staying on Louis’ lap.

“It’s getting late, do you want to wait until another time?” Harry lifts his head, and looks at Louis, face questioning, and doubtful again.

“Will you stay anyway?” He asks, obviously waiting for the answer to be no. “Just, to sleep next to me?”

“I am going to have to get up in about five hours, are you prepared for that alarm?” Louis teases. Harry bites his lip between his teeth, hiding a smile quite poorly.

“I will happily wake up in five hours if you are next to me.”

“Ok, let’s get some rest then.” Louis agrees. Harry climbs to his feet, and takes Louis’ hand, they make their way to the bedroom.

It’s a place that Louis is so familiar with, but it’s like he is looking at it with fresh eyes. Like it’s a place where he belongs now, not just a place that he is stopping over. They quickly go through a rushed bedtime routine before they are settled in. Harry seems determined to give Louis his space, but Louis is having none of it.

“If I get you tonight, I am going to take advantage of every second.” Louis tells him, pulling Harry’s back to his chest, and wrapping his arm over his belly.

“You can have me every night, Lou.” Harry mumbles, already on his way to sleep. Louis smiles into his hair, kissing it gently before he drifts off as well.

 

**

 

Harry wakes up to Louis trying to sneak out of bed. “I’m up.” He grumbles through the haze of sleepiness.

“You don’t have to be.” Louis replies, but it’s fond, and Louis is smiling. Harry can hear it in his voice.

“No, I’ll make you coffee.” Harry says, and he stands before he can talk himself out of it.

Once they’re in the kitchen, the smell of a strong brew filling the air, Louis starts to gather his things. “I am going to have to go soon so I can stop at home before I go to work.” Louis looks at Harry apologetically.

“How much time could I buy if I lent you some clothes?” Harry asks, pouring coffee into two cups.

Louis laughs. “You really think you have anything in this apartment that would fit me?”

“I’ve seen what you wear in that mailroom. I am sure that I have a pair of sweats, and a t shirt that would suit your needs.”

Louis raises a brow at him, and gives him a look that just goes straight to Harry’s belly. “Awfully cheeky for this early in the morning.” Harry can feel himself blush slightly, but he smiles. “Don’t do the cute sub act on me. It’s not going to work.” Louis adds, but there’s a hint of mischief in his eyes, and Harry has to work not to get on his knees for him right in his kitchen.

“It’s so going to work.” He says instead. Louis laughs out loud.

“Yeah, probably.”

 

**

 

It’s still way too early in the morning when Harry finally ventures out into the world. Louis did stay the extra half hour before his shift, but it left Harry awake, and alone for over two hours before he finally decided to venture out towards the office. First thing he does when he gets into the city is head to Sonic’s. He may have had a coffee at 3 am, but it’ was nowhere near enough to keep him going for the day.

When he approaches the stand he sees a familiar blonde head standing at the booth. He is talking animatedly to the man behind the counter. Harry is about to call for him when something strange happens. Niall leans in and... kisses Sonic. On the mouth. Harry is absolutely floored. He stands in stunned silence until Niall turns to look at who is standing behind him. He looks a little bit caught out, but only a little.

“Good morning Mr. Styles.” Niall says, like that is going to get him out of this.

“What? Who? How? what did I just see here?” Harry is fumbling every word.

“Um, a kiss?” Niall replies.

“Why are you kissing Sonic? I thought you had a boyfriend?” Harry can hear his voice get higher with every syllable.

“Oh, ah, well. Harry, meet my boyfriend Zayn.” Niall gives Sonic, or _Zayn_ apparently a sideways glance.  Zayn just shrugs, his usual smile still firmly in place.

“Nice to meet you.” Zayn sticks his hand out in greeting. Harry forgets all manners and shouts in his face.

“You talk?!”

“Of course he talks Harry, Jesus, you don’t have to yell.” Niall rolls his eyes, and gives Sonic, _Zayn_ , shit, a little wave before he ushers Harry away from the stand. Harry only gives a mild thought to the coffee and scone that he planned to purchase. “We’ll send Liam out for coffee. I am going to be late, and I am not leaving you here alone to interrogate my Zayn.”

“I’m sorry, it’s just been a weird couple of days.” Harry replies, still a little dazed.

They walk towards the building silently for a few moments before Niall pipes up. “What kind of weird?” He asks. Harry looks at him skeptically. “Oh come on, you know my secret, now tell me yours.” Harry rolls his eyes.

“If you didn’t want me to know that you were kissing the coffee guy, then you shouldn’t have been kissing the coffee guy at the coffee stand where I go every day.” He sighs. “But fine. Louis and I, I think we are working things out.”

Beside him Niall nods. “You think?”

“We have a lot to talk about still, but we are trying. We will see how tonight goes.” Niall is about to open his mouth again when Harry stops him. “Does Sonic tell you everything people tell him?”

Niall flushes a little, but shakes his head. “Not per se. He will tell me if anyone might need something. Like a friend, or a talking to, or love. He sees a lot of people in the building coming and going. Just like I do. If I think someone needs a place to just unload, I will send them to him. We are a team. But everyone’s secrets are safe with Zayn. Just like everyone’s secrets are safe with me. We don’t gossip. Not even to each other.” Niall says it with such conviction that Harry can’t help but believe him.

“Why don’t you tell anyone that you are together then?” Harry asks.

“Just because you believe what I just told you, doesn’t mean everyone else will. Zayn works in that stand all day because he likes to think that he is helping in some way. He doesn’t need to be there, just like I don’ t need to be a mail room supervisor. We both decided a long time ago that it’s more important to do what makes us feel good than to do what is expected of us. I am not going to deny him that by telling everyone that I may know their secrets. It’s not fair to him.”

Harry takes a second to consider this. “I know that you know about the whole dom/sub thing.” Harry says finally. “That is the issue, or maybe was the issue with Louis and I. He isn’t a dom, or wasn’t. I didn’t want to push him into something he wasn’t interested in, and I spent so much time reminding myself that I shouldn’t push him, that I didn’t notice that he was pushing me instead. I was completely blind to it because I convinced myself that it wasn’t what he wanted. I didn’t even give him a chance.”

“You will give him a chance now?” Niall asks.

“I will, I am. He says he wants it. But we haven’t had a chance to talk about it yet.”

“He’s a good guy. He knows where he’s at. Don’t underestimate him.”

“I know that now, thank you.” Harry says. The thank you goes for more than just the quick line of advice. When Niall makes his way across the ground floor towards his office, Harry follows him. Niall looks at him curiously, but Harry just shrugs. “I haven’t kissed him in almost four hours.”

 

**

 

At night, Harry anxiously waits in his kitchen for Louis to show up again. It’s different from the previous evening. Last night he didn’t even know if he had the strength to look Louis in the face and turn him down. But tonight is a completely different conversation, and Harry would like to be excited about it, but he’s honestly not sure how it will go.

He’s broken out of his worry by the sound of the door ringing. He pushes the button to let Louis in without a greeting. Louis doesn’t bother knocking this time.  He walks into Harry’s space, like he belongs there. Harry can feel a wave of calm washing over him instantly when he sees the smile that Louis gives him. He takes off his jacket, and shoes near the door like he has done so many other times, but it still feels different this time.

Louis walks straight to Harry, and kisses him firmly on the mouth. Harry practically melts into it, even if Louis keeps it chaste by pulling away. “Let's get started?” He asks, and moves toward the low table in the breakfast nook of Harry’s kitchen. It’s the first time that Harry has noticed that there is something in Louis’ hand. It looks like a binder of sorts. Louis lays it on the table, and once he sits down, opens it. Harry sits opposite him, and reads the header on the first page.

 

 **Dom/Sub contracts and negotiations**.

 

It’s typed up, and there are lists with numbers, and checks beside them already in blue ink. Harry spots his name near the top as well as Louis’.

“So you were serious then?” Harry says it mostly as a joke, but seeing this all in front of his makes his belly flutter, and his palms to itch.

“Yes. I have been doing a lot of reading, and a lot of talking to people on the scene.” Louis looks down at the paper for a moment, then back up to Harry. “This is important to me now. I know that I haven’t been involved that long, or actually got to be part of it yet really, but I want to. With you.” Louis’ eyes shine bright, but there is a wariness behind them. He takes a deep breath before he starts talking again. “So if this isn’t something that you want with me, then say so now please.”

Harry hesitates for a minute, confused. “Of course I want it with you, what makes you think that I don’t?”

Louis’ face scrunches a little, Harry can tell that he’s trying to hide something, an emotion, a reaction, Harry doesn’t know. “You didn’t want it with me before yesterday.” Louis replies, his voice small. “Now is your chance to back out.”

“I don’t want to back out. I want you, I want everything with you.” Harry says, genuine, and sincere.

“Can I ask then why you didn’t before?” Louis flinches at his own question, this is probably not how he planned for this night to begin either. “Was it the last guy? Did he hurt you?”

“No! No, this has nothing to do with how my last relationship went. I guess I just decided after it was over between us to wait for someone who was already there. Who could give me what I want. I didn’t want to fall for a guy who was going to turn out not being able to give this to me.” Harry puts his hand on the paper. Louis nods, but Harry can see that he still doesn’t understand. “I tried to separate what we had, what we were doing so much with this that I didn’t see it. I didn’t see you.” I am sorry. I would have given you the chance, I would have a long time ago. I just didn’t see that you wanted it.”

“Okay.” Louis says, and he nods, but his eyes are still wary. Harry sighs.

“It wasn’t because of anything you did Louis. You know that, right?” Louis nods again, looking every bit as young as he is. “You came into my life, and just… nothing has been the same since. You’ve got me to look at things so differently, and God Louis, you are everything.”

“You walked away from me. You were willing to give me up for this.” Louis says back. It’s not an accusation, just a statement of fact. Harry smiles, and shakes his head.

“I doubt it. Even last night I was telling myself that we could make it work. And we could have. We still can. That first morning in the mail room. It was a combination of being in a bad frame of mind, and fear of rejection.”

Louis tilts one side of his mouth up at this. It’s the first time since he has come in that he has looked anything but serious. “So you would have come back pleading on your hands and knees?”

Harry smiles too. “Yes, there is no doubt in my mind.”

“I do want this you know. I want it with you, but I want it no matter what. I don’t want you to ever feel like you pushed me into this.”

“I know, I know that now. Thank you for doing this for me… for us.” Louis ducks his head at the compliment, but he’s smiling. “I am ready to get started now. If that’s alright with you.” Harry adds, gently sliding the binder from Louis’ side of the table to his own, and looking at it in earnest. He’s seen this sort of thing before. It’s not new to him. But it doesn’t make it any less important. He smiles encouragingly at Louis while he starts going over the list.

  
Louis tries to sit as quietly as possible while Harry ticks through a list that Louis had painstakingly written out for him. A lot of things on the list Louis knows is something that neither of them will go anywhere near, but Louis wanted to add everything from the list that he found online. He didn’t want to leave anything out.

It amazes, and scares him a little how easily Harry writes his number into the box beside the words, 1-5, five being the most important, or favourite. It took him all day, and a lot of google to even understand what a lot of these things are. He’s also trying to not peak, but he is really curious. After the third or so time Louis has made some sort of noise of surprise or fear, Harry stops.

“You know, I could have just written these out. The things that I like, I mean.”

“No,” Louis responds, voice coming out a little higher than he would have liked. “I want to be thorough.” Harry just nods, and keeps ticking away.

It takes less than five minutes, and Harry finishes, and hands the list back to him. Louis all but grabs it out of his hand to read. “Okay, receiving anal sex is a five, good start.” He attempts to joke. Harry laughs, but Louis suspects it’s mostly to help calm his nerves. “Branding is a 4?” He tries to not sound accusatory, but it was a big fat no for him. Harry just shrugs.

“It’s fine if you aren’t comfortable, it’s just something I had always wanted to try with someone I was close to.” Harry seems so nonchalant about it that Louis can’t just let it go.

“So you would be fine with me taking a hot poker and sticking it into your skin?”

Harry responds by lifting the cuff of his shirt, revealing more than one tattoo. “I let people stick hundreds of needles in my skin to make permanent marks.” He shrugs again. “It’s fine Lou, it’s not something you want, just forget it.”

“Is this something that’s important to you?” Louis asks in earnest.

“No.” Harry replies, and it’s that final. They communicated, it’s over. Harry reaches over with the pen still in his hand, and scratches out his answer, and that is that. They move on.

“Okay, collars worn in private.” Louis barely manages to choke out, because this was a big deal for him too. He has spent so many night in the last few days picturing Harry wearing a collar, something that Louis has chosen for him. He looks at Harry who can obviously tell how much the idea is affecting Louis. He nods encouragingly. “Have you… have you ever worn a collar before?” Louis ventures to ask. Harry just nods, and smiles knowingly.

“I have one, but I would rather wear one that you choose for me.” Louis has to close his eyes for a moment to compose himself before they move on.

“Double penetration? Have you ever done that before?” Louis asks a little more brave. Harry just shrugs, but gives him that smile that says yes, he has, and that yes he quite enjoyed it. “Jesus” He says under his breath, trying to not picture that for the sake of getting through this list.

“Do I get to see your list?” Harry asks. His voice sounds innocent, but his face is very much cheeky.

“Yes, of course.” Louis says. “I just didn’t want to influence your answers.”

“You wouldn’t have, but thank you for thinking of me.” Harry replies.

“Always thinking of you.” Louis mumbles, almost to himself, but he peeks an eye up at Harry who definitely heard him. “Following orders is a 5, no surprise.” He smiles. Harry just shakes his head. “Forced nudity is a three, and forced masturbation is a two.”

“I don’t like the wording of forced. I like being told what to do, but forced seems like it’s against my will.” Harry says easily.

“So if being naked in private is part of following orders than you are fine, but making it seem like it’s against what you want is not okay.” Louis replies.

“Exactly.” Harry says, and Louis picks up the pen, and writes it into a comment section next to the entries “This okay?” He asks Harry, who nods.

Louis moves on. “You are a three on all gags.” He states.

“I’ve never tried it. You can’t give a safe word wearing a gag, and I have never been with someone who I have felt I wanted to lose that ability for. This is the first time I haven’t marked it as a no actually.”

“You trust me enough for that?”

“Yeah, I do.” Harry says softly. Louis blushes, and keeps looking at the list.

“Hair pulling is a five. I don’t think I have ever played with your hair.” Louis notices that Hary has been letting it get longer than it was when they met.

“You haven’t, but I really want you to.” Harry says immediately. Louis thinks that it’s the first time Harry has ever asked him for anything. He stops what he is doing, and gets up to kiss Harry deeply. While he does, he brings his hand up into Harry’s hair, and pulls gently. Harry immediately sinks into it, groaning slightly.

“We will never get through this if you keep doing that.” Harry moans.

“I know, but it’s the first time you asked for something, and I wanted to reward you.” Louis smiles into Harry’s lips. Harry groans again. Louis gets back to his seat, and keeps looking at the list.

There are a few surprises in there, and a few things that don’t surprise him in the slightest.Harry has ‘kneeling’ as a five, and a big ‘no’ next to everything that involves anyone besides him and Louis. Louis laughs out loud when he gets to Harry’s answer next to permanent name change. “Not unless you put a ring on it” scrawled in the comment section. He has to take another moment to stare at the big five next to ‘over the knee spanking’ as well.

“Jesus Harry, punishment scene is a five?” Louis may need to take a break, and a cold shower.

“Maybe I’m a bad boy.” Harry replies cheekily, and Louis glares at him.

“You’re being a bad boy right now.” He says, and Harry immediately lowers his eyes, but he doesn’t lose the smirk. “Okay, almost done.” He says, mostly to himself.

The last two fives on the list are tattooing, and wearing symbolic jewelry. Louis is determined to make both of those things happen as soon as possible and Harry agrees.

“There’s more, but I need to kiss you right now, so can it wait until later?” Louis says once he finishes the list. Harry nods, and they both stand at the same time, coming together, arms and bodies melting together like they belong.

They make love that night. It’s not a dom with a sub, it’s Louis with Harry, and it’s tender and romantic. They make it slow, and trail kisses up, and down one another’s bodies. Louis asks Harry to fuck him, and Harry says yes. Louis has never felt more cared for, more loved. When they lay in one another’s arms that night Louis tips his head into Harry’s.

“I love you.” Louis says quietly, as though the environment requires quiet voices.

“I love you too, Lou.” Harry says sleepily, without missing a beat. “I am so happy right now.” Louis can see him smile in the dark.

“You are just….this has been so…” Louis tries to come up with words, but they just can’t come. He doesn’t know if it’s the overwhelming day, or the overwhelming sex that’s causing his brain to short circuit.

“I know. Me too.” Harry says with a chuckle. He leans over, and kisses Louis on the temple.

“But--” Louis takes a breath, wondering if this is the right time, wondering if it is too late. Harry lifts his body so that he is face to face with Louis now, concern painted on his face.

“But? But what? What’s going on?”

“Tonight, this,” he gestures between the two of them. “I am going to want this sometimes too. I don’t want to feel like this is the last time I can kiss you tenderly, or ask you to make love to me. Maybe it’s something we should have talked about before. I’m sorry.” Louis looks away, but Harry brings his hand to Louis’ cheek, and gently brings their eyes together again.

“God, Louis, I want that too.” Harry huffs with a smile. “I want it so much.”

“I didn’t know. I felt like when we signed those papers, that was it. I kind of feels like I’m saying goodbye to my vanilla sex forever.” He tries to make it sound funny, but he didn’t realise how nervous he was of that happening until he said it out loud.

Harry sits up fully now, making Louis do so as well. They are sitting crossed leg on the bed now, facing one another. Louis slumps into himself, and Harry reaches for him. Louis gives up his hands easily, and keeps his eye contact with Harry, looking for reassurance. “Listen.” Harry says, voice serious. “I know that we started in unconventional circumstances. I know that it seems like that…” Harry gestures towards the contracts that still sit on his dining table behind the door. “...has been taking up our entire lives. But it’s not who we are. It’s something we do. I want you Louis, all parts of you, and that is just a small part. An important, and really wonderful part, but a small part.” Harry looks at Louis with hope, and trepidation while Louis processes everything he said.

“So you are okay if every once in awhile it’s just me and you in here?” Louis points to the bed.

“I’m more than okay with it, I want it, just as much as you.”

“And what about outside of here? Who are we?” Louis asks.

“Still me and you, with a little bit of that, if we want. We make the rules, Lou. Me and you, no one else.”

Louis can feel the wave of relief wash over him, and he sinks into Harry, kissing him softly. They make the rules, and they can talk to each other about everything, anything.  “You are so perfect Harry, I am so lucky to have found you.” Louis says, breaking the kiss. Harry just smiles, and pulls him down into the bed again.

Louis is home.

 

**

 

_Three months later_

 

Harry sits quietly in his bedroom for Louis to come in. It’s been a long day, a long week if he’s being honest with himself, and he hasn’t seen his boyfriend for most of it, save a rushed lunch date in front of Sonic’s. Zayn has mostly gone back to his no talking policy in the stand, but after Louis convinced Niall that they should get together for a double date, he has been a lot more willing to converse with both of them.

When he hears the door click open he can feel the tension start to drain from his body. Just knowing that Louis is in the same building as him has that effect on him. He waits, silent for Louis to come and find him. Louis doesn’t call out, or demand to know where Harry is, he just makes his way silently through the apartment until he gets to Harry’s bedroom.

When he finally appears in the doorway his eyes soften. Harry is sitting crossed leg at the head of the bed, in nothing but his underwear. Harry watches him come in, and take off his jacket, and lay it carefully on the chair by the door. He loosens his tie, and sits gently on the bed beside Harry.

“Long day?” Louis asks, Harry nods. “Words please darling.”

“Yes.” Harry replies.

“Are you hungry? Want to have a little dinner?” Louis questions, rubbing his hand up Harry’s bare arm.

“No, I ate before you got here.” Harry says demurely. Louis nods, looking at Harry up and down, he licks his lips, and smiles a little to himself.

“Need me to take care of you?” Louis asks, finally.

“Please.” Harry practically hisses through his teeth.

Louis brings the hand that was stroking Harry’s arm up to his collarbone, and then the back of his neck, trailing his fingers up to the shorter hairs in the back of his neck. He gives a tug, and brings Harry’s head back, exposing his neck for Louis to kiss, and bite at. Louis is always careful to not leave marks where Harry can’t cover them for work, but everywhere else is fair game, and soon Louis is making small bruises on Harry’s chest, just between the sparrows, and the butterfly.

“Turn over, let me see you.” Louis demands, and Harry is quick to leave his embrace --and his boxers-- to get on his hands and knees. Louis pushes on his back, causing Harry’s face to be in the pillows, and his ass to be even more opened, and exposed. Louis wastes no time, or words sucking a bruise into the soft part of Harry’s cheek that elicit a loud moan out of him. “Gonna fill you up.” Louis tells him, and Harry can hear the cap of the lube bottle open. Louis’ firm, but gentle fingers start prodding his hole seconds later. He does his best not to push back into the feeling, trying to be as still as possible, and is soon rewarded with the hard feeling of a plug being pushed into him. “Very nice.” Louis says once the plug is in place. “How does that feel, baby?” He asks.

“Good, perfect.” Harry moans.

“Good, now roll over. On your back, come on.” Louis instructs, and Harry rolls feeling the lazy weight on his limbs already. Louis moves away from the bed, and into the closet where they keep most of their play things. He comes out with two items. One is a long length of black silk. Harry wears it as an accessory often, but Louis likes it for something entirely different. The other thing is also black, and it’s a collar, simple with a silver buckle on the back. Harry lifts his head as soon as Louis comes towards him with it, allowing him to easily slip it onto his neck. He then crawls onto Harry’s chest, and straddles him while bringing both of Harry’s wrists up to the slotted headboard.

“Alright babe, how are you now?” Louis asks, inspecting his work with a satisfied smirk.

“Good, yes.” Harry squirms a little, trying out the pressure of the scarf, and the angle of the plug. Louis just gives Harry a squeeze on his hip, and stills him instantly.

“You look so pretty like this, baby. Do you know that?” Louis asks, stroking Harry’s chest “Do you want to make me feel good now?”

“Yes, sir” Harry breathes out. Louis begins to undo his belt. Harry can practically feel the water start to pool in his mouth.  

“I feel good then you feel good, alright?”

“Yes, sir.” Harry repeats.

“Are you going to need the ring? Keep your cock hard for me?” Harry actually has to think about that for a second, between the plug brushing against his prostate with every shift, and the sight in front of him, on top of him, he wonders how long he will last. Finally he shakes his head no.

“No, sir.” He bites his lip, hoping it’s not a lie.

“You know if you lie to me, you’re going to have to be punished.” Louis says with a stern voice, and sharp eyes. Harry can feel his cock jump at the words.

“Yes, sir.” He chokes out, and Louis seems satisfied with that answer. He begins to stroke himself through his pants, and Harry forgets for a second that he’s tied to the bed, and reaches out for him.

“Ah ah, don’t be greedy. You will get what you need.” Louis smirks at him. He then fishes his own hard cock out of his pants, and Harry can see how hard, and ready he is as well.

Harry brings his head up to reach the tip, and opens wide to give room for Louis to thrust in. Louis does and lets out a satisfied sigh while doing so, similar to the one you make when dipping into a warm bath. He reaches down, and grabs the back of Harry’s head, keeping him in place so that Harry can concentrate on keeping his mouth relaxed and taking Louis in.

“Fuck Harry, that feels good.” Louis grits out as he picks up the speed. Harry tries to swallow around him despite the angle making it difficult. He can feel liquid starting to spill down his chin. Louis leans further into him to get deeper, and holds himself there for a few seconds before releasing Harry completely, leaving him gasping for breath. “Fuck, I want to come in your mouth, but I also want to turn you over and see you bent over for me.” Louis says, a predatory look in his eyes.

“Please.” Harry begs. He would take all of it right now.

“You’re all messy babe. Like me making a mess of you?” Louis wipes a strand of spit on the corner of Harry’s mouth. He doesn’t wait for the answer before he pushes Harry’s mouth open again with his fingers, and plunges back into his mouth. He pumps into him a few more times before he comes without warning down his throat. “Swallow it.” Louis commands. Harry obliges happily. Louis undoes Harry’s hands before he rolls over on his back, heaving from his orgasm. “If you can get me hard again, then I will let you come.” Louis looks at Harry who is painfully hard by now.

He whimpers, but gets onto his hands, and knees again, and starts to lick up and down Louis’ softening erection. Louis winces a little at the over sensitivity, but he reaches for Harry’s head, and starts to scratch, and pull at his hair before his fingers make their way down to the collar. He loops a finger into the large buckle, and starts to pull, slow and light. It’s just enough to remind Harry that he’s wearing one, just enough to remind him who he belongs to. He moans again, feeling his erection brush against the rumpled sheets.

It takes a little while, but Louis does get hard again, and Harry actually sighs in relief. “Up you go.” Louis tells him, indicating Harry straddle Louis this time. Harry of course does without question. Louis reaches up, and brings Harry’s down by the collar, so that their chests are flush. He reaches around, and pulls the plug out with one yank, and it leaves Harry open, and wanting.

“Please sir, please.” Harry begs. Louis kneads at his ass, brushing his erection with the wet cleft of Harry’s ass.

“If you want to get off, you better start moving love.” He whispers in Harry’s ear, and Harry doesn’t have to be told twice. He lines himself up with Louis, and sinks down gently. “Come on H, make me come again.” Louis tells him “You want to come, don’t you?”

“Yes, sir.” Harry says breathlessly, grinding up and down, getting as deep as he can, trying to avoid his prostate until Louis tells him that he's allowed to come. But Louis has other ideas. He starts to angle himself until he hears the telltale sound of Harry being right on the edge. Harry can feel the tears start to prick at the corner of his eyes from want when Louis starts to meet his thrusts with his own.

“Okay baby, want to see you come, come on my cock babe.” Louis says, and it doesn’t take much else besides Louis’ voice giving him permission. Harry throws his head back, and comes hard, and fast all over himself, and Louis, and Louis comes less than a minute later, burried deep inside Harry.

Harry slumps forward, tired, and sated. Louis gently rolls him over onto his side, and curls into his arms for a minute before he starts to stroke his face gently.

“How are you now, love?” Louis asks gently. Harry smiles, eyes still closed.

“Good, thank you.” Harry responds. Louis squeezes him harder.

“Want to clean up?” Louis asks. “Or cuddle for a few minutes?”

“Clean up, get some food.” Harry says, slowly feeling his limbs come back to him.

“I thought you ate.” Louis accuses

“I did, but you didn’t, and I am hungry again.” Harry chuckles, finally looking at Louis, who is still in his dress shirt, but nothing else.

“Mhhm,” Louis responds. “I am a little hungry.” He goes to get up, but pauses. “You did really well, you know that?” Louis says. It’s a compliment, but he sounds almost disappointed.

“Maybe I’ll be bad next time. “ Harry says cheekily. Louis laughs, not even a little embarrassed at being caught out.

“One can hope.” He says with a teasing wistful voice. They both head to the bathroom for a well deserved shower.

 


End file.
